There was a time when batting averages meant more to me than Batman.
In my pre-teen years, I was a baseball fan. Specifically the St. Louis Cardinals, largely because my Mom's side of the family lived in St. Louis and I had been to their games. And at the very top of the list of favorite baseball players was Ozzie Smith. In the 80's and early 90's he dominated the Golden Glove competitions. He was an acrobat on the field, making amazing catches and plays on a daily basis. And at every game, he would come onto the field for introductions by doing a flip. I tried to emulate this in my baseball days by doing a handspring off the field if we won.
One day, we were in St. Louis visiting with family and we went to his restaurant- Ozzies's. While we were ordering, I happened to look up, and through the back door walked my idol- Ozzie Smith himself. Clearly, he didn't want a lot of attention, and it looked like he was there on business, but one of my family members managed to get me an audience with him. So, there I stood, about to meet the epitome of baseball in my life- and I was terrified. Excited, overwhelmed, but most definitely terrified. I didn't want to offend him, or put him out, I didn't want to do anything to cause him to be angry at me. I had always heard he was a nice guy, but he was so famous, so important, what right had I to ask for his attention. But I did, and managed an autograph as well, but not before being so in shock that I forgot my name. I still have that autograph, and a picture with my childhood hero, (and a pilfered menu from the restaurant) framed in my home.
I would imagine the feeling I had that day was not unlike the feeling the Hebrews had at Mt. Sinai, only they were justified in fearing the wrath of God being unleashed. They stood at the feet of a mountain that was, for the moment, home to their God. They had seen his exploits, his displays of power, and they had seen the results: lots of dead people. So they feared this powerful God. Hebrews 12:18-21 says it this way:
" You have not come to a mountain that can be touched and that is burning with fire; to darkness, gloom and storm; to a trumpet blast or to such a voice speaking words that those who heard it begged that no further word be spoken to them, because they could not bear what was commanded: “If even an animal touches the mountain, it must be stoned to death.” The sight was so terrifying that Moses said, “I am trembling with fear.”
We call this the Old Testament God. He is full of wrath and fire and judgment and war. He scares us. So we like to think nothing of Him. He is a historical God, and God has changed. He is now much more approachable, much nicer. Hebrews 12: 22-24 even gives that impression on first glance:
But you have come to Mount Zion, to the city of the living God, the heavenly Jerusalem. You have come to thousands upon thousands of angels in joyful assembly, to the church of the firstborn, whose names are written in heaven. You have come to God, the Judge of all, to the spirits of the righteous made perfect, to Jesus the mediator of a new covenant, and to the sprinkled blood that speaks a better word than the blood of Abel.
Our God is happy now. He is gentle and sweet, he does not hold us under the threat of death. Does He?
It seems we believe that God changed. That He softened as He grew older. But the Bible says God doesn't change, that He is the "same yesterday, today and forever." (Hebrews 13:8) And then we read the rest of that passage in Hebrews 12:25-29, and we see that in fact, God has not changed:
See to it that you do not refuse him who speaks. If they did not escape when they refused him who warned them on earth, how much less will we, if we turn away from him who warns us from heaven? At that time his voice shook the earth, but now he has promised, “Once more I will shake not only the earth but also the heavens.” The words “once more” indicate the removing of what can be shaken—that is, created things—so that what cannot be shaken may remain.
Therefore, since we are receiving a kingdom that cannot be shaken, let us be thankful, and so worship God acceptably with reverence and awe, for our “God is a consuming fire.”
Like the awe and reverence I felt that day with Ozzie Smith are we to worship God. Still not flippantly, still not with empty promises, but now, we are friends- respectful friends, because we are definitely the lesser in the friendship. So if God didn't change, and He is still that wrathful, passionate, jealous God, why are we able to approach Him without that same fear of death?
Because God changed the people He has chosen.
I'm not saying He changed the chosen from the Jews to the Christians- He changed those who chose Him. We are different from the Hebrews at Sinai, from Uzza when he touched the Ark of the Covenant improperly, different even from David who made choices that lead to tragedies and plagues. They all still sought God with their own heart, some better than others. But we who choose God do not seek Him with our own heart.
We seek Him with a new heart.
Jeremiah 24:7 has God saying "I will give them a heart to know me, that I am the LORD. They will be my people, and I will be their God, for they will return to me with all their heart. " The Old Testament people had hearts incapable of knowing God intimately, there was a separation that could not be bridged, no matter how many sacrifices and offerings they made. There was a disconnect from God. He was perfect, and they were not, so they could not be near to Him. This prophecy of Jeremiah was fulfilled through Jesus, when we who came to Jesus were given a new heart- that we may know God. While we are not yet perfect, God has made the way we can worship Him perfect. WE still mess it up, but the opportunity to worship God in perfect union with Him is there. We can approach God, because He has made it possible.
So today, the God we worship is still the God of the Old Testament. He is still jealous, still wrathful, still powerful in battle- still a warrior (Exodus 15:3). But He is also compassionate, gracious, slow to anger and abounding in love (Exodus 34:6), just like He always has been. I wish we approached Him in worship, prayer and everyday life with a bit of a mix: part reverence, awe and fear, and part as friends. He is our friend who loves us and forgives us, but He is also our friend who can wipe us from existence and holds our eternity in His grasp.
Ozzie Smith was a nice guy, he was kind and patient with me. But his presence still made me tremble with a bit of fear. Because he mattered so much to me as a pre-teen I wanted- no, I needed- to be right in his presence. I wanted to be worthy of meeting him and getting his autograph, and I wanted it so bad that I was in awe of him.
Does God matter that much to us, that we want so badly to be worthy of His gift that we quake before Him?
Friday, December 31, 2010
Tuesday, December 28, 2010
God is and Elitist...and Thats OK
I remember the first time I was faced with the concept that I really wish I could redesign God.
I was a college freshman and my roommate and his girlfriend were in a heated debate over whether or not Jesus was the only way to heaven. He was a nominal Catholic (meaning he went to church, but didn't pay attention) and she was a Baptist. He felt very strongly that people devoted to their faith, any faith, surely wouldn't be punished by God. Eventually, they looked at me to settle the debate. I responded with what I very firmly knew, "Jesus is THE Way, THE Truth, and THE Life. No one comes to the Father except through Him." Confident that I had sufficiently settled the debate, I went back to trying to avoid this sort of conversation. But then he asked, "OK, but what about those people who have never heard of Jesus specifically? What if they worship a concept of God, without knowing the specifics? Would they still go to Hell for not accepting Jesus?"
The question really struck me. On one hand, I firmly believed what Jesus said about being the only way to the Father. On the other, it seemed really harsh of God to send these folks innocently ignorant of Him to Hell. I honestly didn't ( and really, still don't) know what to say to that, but I said that I believe God provides a way for them anyway.
And so, I made my first post-modern statement on God, long before I knew what post-modern was.
I have come to see that it is common and accepted for us to state what we think God would do, based only on what we want Him to do. There are the Pat Robertsons of the world who want God to judge harshly the sinners, so Hurricane Katrina is a judgment on 'sinful New Orleans.' There are a lot of folks who want God to be a teddy bear of love an acceptance for all, so they create doctrines that say nothing is sin. There are those who want God to be benevolent and a pacifist, so they protest wars and seek more government aid for the poor- while condemning those who don't agree with their methods.
On a personal level, I can think of times in the not to distant present when I, as a pastor, have been asked a question, and knowing that my response might alienate the questioner, tried to tailor my response to be what they want to hear- or at least a more easily digested response. I think my wanting to be liked and to pastor a church that is liked has made me sometimes wishy-washy with things of a concrete nature. Because of that, I can relate to people who try to make God in their own image, and it makes me a little angry at myself.
And it doesn't just happen with ideologue, politicians, activists and pastors, we all do it. We adopt an opinion and try to make sure God ( and everyone else) agrees with us.
But God is an elitist.
God is an Elitist, and That's OK
I really despise elitism amongst people. Elitism, as we know it, is just that at some point, someone decided one thing was more high brow than an another. Opera (soap operas sung in Latin) are determined to be more elite than Country Music (soap operas sung in Texan). Certain schools are more elite than others- sometimes justifiably so, sometimes because Old Money went to that one and not the other. Elitism, in my opinion is about believing that I am better than you, and that you are unable to comprehend just why, because you are too simple.
By that definition, God is an elitist.
God is better than us. He's perfect, so He's got that squared away. And truthfully, we really are too simple to understand why His ways are better than ours. (Right here is where He would play the "I'm Perfect!" card, if His ways were about the playing of such cards.) Inherent in that, is that we can't make sense of our God's choices, so we are lesser beings that He.
And that's OK.
The problem arises when we live in a world that demands to know how and why things work, but at the same time demands that there be nothing definitive about those things. "It may work for you, but it doesn't work for me." This may be a true statement for a workout regimen, but it cannot be true for the foundational aspects of God.
Some Things Are Not Negotiable
There are aspects of the Christian faith that are negotiable. We have freedom, given by Christ on the Cross to not be bound to extreme legalism. So, there is no absolute decree that I can't watch an R rated movie or have a beer. But for some people, they feel a strong desire to avoid those things, and they may attribute it to the conviction of the Holy Spirit. I view this type of thing as a negotiable- if the Bible doesn't explicitly say 'Yea' or 'Nay,' then the answer is to be found in personal interaction with God.
Non-negotiables are things explicitly stated about God. For instance, and back to where this started: There is one God, and one way to Him. Is it harsh? Is it elitist? Is is exclusionary? Absolutely. But keep in mind that God has always been this way. In the Old Testament, it was routine that an ENTIRE city be destroyed along with ALL inhabitants (kids and pets, too) so that the Israelites not be tempted with other gods. God is an elitist because He believes Himself better than anything else. In fact, He believes He is the ONLY one. Now, if I believe everything else God says about Himself (Creator, Perfect, Savior, Provider, Protector, Comforter, etc), how can I deny that when He says He is the Only God, He's telling the truth?
It is a pick and choose, a cafeteria plan God, we want to serve today. We want a God who is all loving, a pacifist, a nice guy who wouldn't heart a fly- or say anything bad you either. God is a kind, compassionate God who loves the poor and sick, but God is also a jealous God who has raised nations only to destroy them. God has used national disasters to destroy the wicked, God has shown immense kindness to those who are weak and poor, and He has sought an end to violence and war.
Jesus himself is a contradiction, a being beyond our comprehension in many ways. Jesus came healing and speaking of love and restoration of things. But he also said he came to divide families, to turn children and parents against each other. Jesus spoke of peace, yet grew violent when people made a mockery of God. Jesus broke no laws of God, yet made it so that we were no longer slaves to that same law.
The truth is, we need to be very careful when we try to speak for God. The truth is, we never know exactly what God is thinking. Like my opening story, I know Jesus is the only way to the Father- He said so. What I don't know is if or how He will reveal Himself to people who know nothing of Jesus. Honestly, I don't know how He will reveal Himself to my own kids. So rather than try to make God do or say what I think will be best for someone to hear, I'll pray.
I'll pray that God makes clear the path I should follow, and the path I should point others to. I'll stop giving advice that protects my popularity, and start giving advice that is founded in the unshakable Truth of who Christ is.
And rather than me telling you what I think that Truth is- I'll tell you to seek Him for yourself. Ask me questions about what I believe, sure, but know that what I say is a very distant second to what He will reveal to you in His way.
We need to know what and why we believe, and the only way to discover that is to seek God and rely on His answers. Then, we need to stand on His truth, and not ride the fence.
That's really what I find wrong with much of today's theology- those who know what they believe are too afraid of culture to say what they really believe. And too often, those who do say what they really believe say it not out of love, but out of a desire to appear right and elite.
And really, God is the only one justified in being an Elitist.
I was a college freshman and my roommate and his girlfriend were in a heated debate over whether or not Jesus was the only way to heaven. He was a nominal Catholic (meaning he went to church, but didn't pay attention) and she was a Baptist. He felt very strongly that people devoted to their faith, any faith, surely wouldn't be punished by God. Eventually, they looked at me to settle the debate. I responded with what I very firmly knew, "Jesus is THE Way, THE Truth, and THE Life. No one comes to the Father except through Him." Confident that I had sufficiently settled the debate, I went back to trying to avoid this sort of conversation. But then he asked, "OK, but what about those people who have never heard of Jesus specifically? What if they worship a concept of God, without knowing the specifics? Would they still go to Hell for not accepting Jesus?"
The question really struck me. On one hand, I firmly believed what Jesus said about being the only way to the Father. On the other, it seemed really harsh of God to send these folks innocently ignorant of Him to Hell. I honestly didn't ( and really, still don't) know what to say to that, but I said that I believe God provides a way for them anyway.
And so, I made my first post-modern statement on God, long before I knew what post-modern was.
I have come to see that it is common and accepted for us to state what we think God would do, based only on what we want Him to do. There are the Pat Robertsons of the world who want God to judge harshly the sinners, so Hurricane Katrina is a judgment on 'sinful New Orleans.' There are a lot of folks who want God to be a teddy bear of love an acceptance for all, so they create doctrines that say nothing is sin. There are those who want God to be benevolent and a pacifist, so they protest wars and seek more government aid for the poor- while condemning those who don't agree with their methods.
On a personal level, I can think of times in the not to distant present when I, as a pastor, have been asked a question, and knowing that my response might alienate the questioner, tried to tailor my response to be what they want to hear- or at least a more easily digested response. I think my wanting to be liked and to pastor a church that is liked has made me sometimes wishy-washy with things of a concrete nature. Because of that, I can relate to people who try to make God in their own image, and it makes me a little angry at myself.
And it doesn't just happen with ideologue, politicians, activists and pastors, we all do it. We adopt an opinion and try to make sure God ( and everyone else) agrees with us.
But God is an elitist.
God is an Elitist, and That's OK
I really despise elitism amongst people. Elitism, as we know it, is just that at some point, someone decided one thing was more high brow than an another. Opera (soap operas sung in Latin) are determined to be more elite than Country Music (soap operas sung in Texan). Certain schools are more elite than others- sometimes justifiably so, sometimes because Old Money went to that one and not the other. Elitism, in my opinion is about believing that I am better than you, and that you are unable to comprehend just why, because you are too simple.
By that definition, God is an elitist.
God is better than us. He's perfect, so He's got that squared away. And truthfully, we really are too simple to understand why His ways are better than ours. (Right here is where He would play the "I'm Perfect!" card, if His ways were about the playing of such cards.) Inherent in that, is that we can't make sense of our God's choices, so we are lesser beings that He.
And that's OK.
The problem arises when we live in a world that demands to know how and why things work, but at the same time demands that there be nothing definitive about those things. "It may work for you, but it doesn't work for me." This may be a true statement for a workout regimen, but it cannot be true for the foundational aspects of God.
Some Things Are Not Negotiable
There are aspects of the Christian faith that are negotiable. We have freedom, given by Christ on the Cross to not be bound to extreme legalism. So, there is no absolute decree that I can't watch an R rated movie or have a beer. But for some people, they feel a strong desire to avoid those things, and they may attribute it to the conviction of the Holy Spirit. I view this type of thing as a negotiable- if the Bible doesn't explicitly say 'Yea' or 'Nay,' then the answer is to be found in personal interaction with God.
Non-negotiables are things explicitly stated about God. For instance, and back to where this started: There is one God, and one way to Him. Is it harsh? Is it elitist? Is is exclusionary? Absolutely. But keep in mind that God has always been this way. In the Old Testament, it was routine that an ENTIRE city be destroyed along with ALL inhabitants (kids and pets, too) so that the Israelites not be tempted with other gods. God is an elitist because He believes Himself better than anything else. In fact, He believes He is the ONLY one. Now, if I believe everything else God says about Himself (Creator, Perfect, Savior, Provider, Protector, Comforter, etc), how can I deny that when He says He is the Only God, He's telling the truth?
It is a pick and choose, a cafeteria plan God, we want to serve today. We want a God who is all loving, a pacifist, a nice guy who wouldn't heart a fly- or say anything bad you either. God is a kind, compassionate God who loves the poor and sick, but God is also a jealous God who has raised nations only to destroy them. God has used national disasters to destroy the wicked, God has shown immense kindness to those who are weak and poor, and He has sought an end to violence and war.
Jesus himself is a contradiction, a being beyond our comprehension in many ways. Jesus came healing and speaking of love and restoration of things. But he also said he came to divide families, to turn children and parents against each other. Jesus spoke of peace, yet grew violent when people made a mockery of God. Jesus broke no laws of God, yet made it so that we were no longer slaves to that same law.
The truth is, we need to be very careful when we try to speak for God. The truth is, we never know exactly what God is thinking. Like my opening story, I know Jesus is the only way to the Father- He said so. What I don't know is if or how He will reveal Himself to people who know nothing of Jesus. Honestly, I don't know how He will reveal Himself to my own kids. So rather than try to make God do or say what I think will be best for someone to hear, I'll pray.
I'll pray that God makes clear the path I should follow, and the path I should point others to. I'll stop giving advice that protects my popularity, and start giving advice that is founded in the unshakable Truth of who Christ is.
And rather than me telling you what I think that Truth is- I'll tell you to seek Him for yourself. Ask me questions about what I believe, sure, but know that what I say is a very distant second to what He will reveal to you in His way.
We need to know what and why we believe, and the only way to discover that is to seek God and rely on His answers. Then, we need to stand on His truth, and not ride the fence.
That's really what I find wrong with much of today's theology- those who know what they believe are too afraid of culture to say what they really believe. And too often, those who do say what they really believe say it not out of love, but out of a desire to appear right and elite.
And really, God is the only one justified in being an Elitist.
Tuesday, December 21, 2010
Giving is a Choice
I have this little idiosyncrasy where if someone tells me I have to do something, I immediately don't want to do it. Maybe it's my anti-authority stance, maybe it's my desire to first discover things for myself. Maybe, I'm just strange.
By the way, this isn't just things like, "You have to get this project done, " or "You have to pay your bills, " it is also suggestions from friends that go like "You have to read this book/see this movie/eat this food."
I guess, to me, if something becomes an obligation then it is no longer capable of being a joy for me. Case in point: I always loved history. I can watch the History Channel for hours. I was one class short of minoring in History in college. But I never read a single book a professor told me to in college. Even books I had wanted to read would go unread because it had become a requirement.
Maybe I am strange.
Lately, it seems that everyone is telling me that Christians have to care about the poor. I already knew this, and also already knew my deficiencies in doing something about it. Politicians have made a lot of great sound-bites arguing for more aid to the poor, the undocumented workers, the unemployed. They are people, and we should, as believers in a compassionate Savior, be moved to brokenness over the plight of a fellow human being. The political argument has been that it is the moral obligation of the United States Government to provide for the welfare of these people. Essentially, I, as a taxpayer, MUST help my fellow people.
Now, I am not going to speak to my political views on these issues, but I am going to speak to my personal feelings about not having a choice in giving charity.
It is not charity, it is not giving, if it is forced.
I don't only see this coming from our government , I see this coming from Christianity. We are told we must give. Oh, it's not done in the same way, it is much more subtle. You don't pay your taxes, the government takes your stuff. But Christianity has decided that we need to make you feel bad if you don't give. That you are less of a Christian if you don't give to the less fortunate. Let me say right here, we ARE called to give to others, we are called to take care of one another.
We are called to do it cheerfully, and of our own accord. AKA, not because we are guilted, or coerced, or forced into it. The fact is, I think there are a lot of us that would rather look the other way when it comes to poverty. When we do give, it is more out of obligation than out of love and true concern. The truth is, we are not better Christians because we give to the less fortunate, we are better people when we love each other and care for each other's needs of our own choice.
Choice is what it comes down to. If Jesus forced us to choose Him, then we would be with Him out of obligation, not love. If we give, to our church or the poor or the weak, because we have no choice or because we feel guilty, then it is not done in worship. Yeah, the people who get cared for benefit greatly, and there is no taking that good thing away. But as an individual, don't you want to do good AND become a better person in the process?
So we need to choose: to give willingly, and cheerfully? Or, do we allow ourselves to be forced to give? Like any time I'm told I HAVE to do something, I immediately put up a wall. So my answer? Before someone tells me I have to care about the poor, I'm going to start caring about the poor. Before I am forced to give, I will be prepared to give when the need arises.
By the way, this isn't just things like, "You have to get this project done, " or "You have to pay your bills, " it is also suggestions from friends that go like "You have to read this book/see this movie/eat this food."
I guess, to me, if something becomes an obligation then it is no longer capable of being a joy for me. Case in point: I always loved history. I can watch the History Channel for hours. I was one class short of minoring in History in college. But I never read a single book a professor told me to in college. Even books I had wanted to read would go unread because it had become a requirement.
Maybe I am strange.
Lately, it seems that everyone is telling me that Christians have to care about the poor. I already knew this, and also already knew my deficiencies in doing something about it. Politicians have made a lot of great sound-bites arguing for more aid to the poor, the undocumented workers, the unemployed. They are people, and we should, as believers in a compassionate Savior, be moved to brokenness over the plight of a fellow human being. The political argument has been that it is the moral obligation of the United States Government to provide for the welfare of these people. Essentially, I, as a taxpayer, MUST help my fellow people.
Now, I am not going to speak to my political views on these issues, but I am going to speak to my personal feelings about not having a choice in giving charity.
It is not charity, it is not giving, if it is forced.
I don't only see this coming from our government , I see this coming from Christianity. We are told we must give. Oh, it's not done in the same way, it is much more subtle. You don't pay your taxes, the government takes your stuff. But Christianity has decided that we need to make you feel bad if you don't give. That you are less of a Christian if you don't give to the less fortunate. Let me say right here, we ARE called to give to others, we are called to take care of one another.
We are called to do it cheerfully, and of our own accord. AKA, not because we are guilted, or coerced, or forced into it. The fact is, I think there are a lot of us that would rather look the other way when it comes to poverty. When we do give, it is more out of obligation than out of love and true concern. The truth is, we are not better Christians because we give to the less fortunate, we are better people when we love each other and care for each other's needs of our own choice.
Choice is what it comes down to. If Jesus forced us to choose Him, then we would be with Him out of obligation, not love. If we give, to our church or the poor or the weak, because we have no choice or because we feel guilty, then it is not done in worship. Yeah, the people who get cared for benefit greatly, and there is no taking that good thing away. But as an individual, don't you want to do good AND become a better person in the process?
So we need to choose: to give willingly, and cheerfully? Or, do we allow ourselves to be forced to give? Like any time I'm told I HAVE to do something, I immediately put up a wall. So my answer? Before someone tells me I have to care about the poor, I'm going to start caring about the poor. Before I am forced to give, I will be prepared to give when the need arises.
Wednesday, December 15, 2010
Can Bars and Churches Be Friends?
I've mentioned before that my church, the Gate, meets at a local bar/dancehall called Hurricane Harry's. We have developed a pretty good relationship with Lance and Craig, two of the managers who open for us on Sunday nights, so a couple weeks back, Lance approached me with a proposition. On the 12th of December, the bar was hosting a Toys for Tots drive- a 30 band concert- which meant we couldn't meet there that night, but he wondered if we would be interested in helping out.
We agreed to do that, since we were looking for more ways to serve the community, and loved the idea of serving others instead of having just a worship service. We later got asked if we would grill burgers and links for the workers, and charge a little money, some of which could go to the toy drive. We agreed, but decided to make all the money we made go to the drive. Wally, my co-pastor, and I headed it up, with a few of the folks from the church dropping in to help out a bit: Kristin and the kids, Yako, Evan, Nate, Jess, Jon, and Daniel. The attendance was lighter than we'd hoped, and what we didn't realize was that it was going to be cold.
The two of us were literally huddled as close to the grill as possible without burning ourselves. Thankfully, we had some half walls to block at least some of the 10-15 mph winds that were pushing forty-ish degree temps around our heads. Eventually, someone would come out and we'd have to spring into grilling action on a hamburger or a sausage link, we'd chat with the person and collect their money, thanking them for helping out. In the end, we raised just over $168 for Toys for Tots. Not bad for our first attempt.
But there was something else more important going on for us. See, I've seen throughout my life a certain, I guess I'd say animosity, between churches and bars. At best they tolerate each other, but more often than not a church can be heard decrying the evils of the bar. That's not to say that bad thing don't happen at bars, sin is definitely present. Not unlike how sin can be present at a church, you know, when we lie, or connive, or shun the different. I've heard local pastors literally seethe with anger at the bar patrons who leave trash on their lawn- and at times I've been one of those pastors- and lament the very existence of the bars.
Sunday for the Gate was about helping out kids, but it was also about stating to the bars and bar patrons in town that we still care enough about them as people to actually hang out with them. We had really good conversations with the people who came to our grill (supplied by local radio station KORA), and some of them even expressed amazement that we were a church helping a bar. To me, it shouldn't be shocking that a church is trying to help people, regardless of the venue. Christ came to care for people, whether they were poor or rich, virtuous or sleazy, sober or drunk. We let these people who may have had little or no contact with churches see that we Christians are normal people, too. And we got to see that these artists and their fans are normal people, too. There is no need for us to fear them, nor them to fear us. It was a beginning of what we hope to be a continuing dialogue with this section of the culture of Bryan/College Station and A&M. The fact is, I really genuinely liked the people we met, and would like to spend more time with them. And not just if they come to our church.
Because the people of Northgate and the bars that populate it are one big reason why we came here. To love them. To show them Jesus in our compassion, our love, and yes, in our attention to them. And not just if they come to church.
And we are very thankful to have had this opportunity.
We agreed to do that, since we were looking for more ways to serve the community, and loved the idea of serving others instead of having just a worship service. We later got asked if we would grill burgers and links for the workers, and charge a little money, some of which could go to the toy drive. We agreed, but decided to make all the money we made go to the drive. Wally, my co-pastor, and I headed it up, with a few of the folks from the church dropping in to help out a bit: Kristin and the kids, Yako, Evan, Nate, Jess, Jon, and Daniel. The attendance was lighter than we'd hoped, and what we didn't realize was that it was going to be cold.
The two of us were literally huddled as close to the grill as possible without burning ourselves. Thankfully, we had some half walls to block at least some of the 10-15 mph winds that were pushing forty-ish degree temps around our heads. Eventually, someone would come out and we'd have to spring into grilling action on a hamburger or a sausage link, we'd chat with the person and collect their money, thanking them for helping out. In the end, we raised just over $168 for Toys for Tots. Not bad for our first attempt.
But there was something else more important going on for us. See, I've seen throughout my life a certain, I guess I'd say animosity, between churches and bars. At best they tolerate each other, but more often than not a church can be heard decrying the evils of the bar. That's not to say that bad thing don't happen at bars, sin is definitely present. Not unlike how sin can be present at a church, you know, when we lie, or connive, or shun the different. I've heard local pastors literally seethe with anger at the bar patrons who leave trash on their lawn- and at times I've been one of those pastors- and lament the very existence of the bars.
Sunday for the Gate was about helping out kids, but it was also about stating to the bars and bar patrons in town that we still care enough about them as people to actually hang out with them. We had really good conversations with the people who came to our grill (supplied by local radio station KORA), and some of them even expressed amazement that we were a church helping a bar. To me, it shouldn't be shocking that a church is trying to help people, regardless of the venue. Christ came to care for people, whether they were poor or rich, virtuous or sleazy, sober or drunk. We let these people who may have had little or no contact with churches see that we Christians are normal people, too. And we got to see that these artists and their fans are normal people, too. There is no need for us to fear them, nor them to fear us. It was a beginning of what we hope to be a continuing dialogue with this section of the culture of Bryan/College Station and A&M. The fact is, I really genuinely liked the people we met, and would like to spend more time with them. And not just if they come to our church.
Because the people of Northgate and the bars that populate it are one big reason why we came here. To love them. To show them Jesus in our compassion, our love, and yes, in our attention to them. And not just if they come to church.
And we are very thankful to have had this opportunity.
Friday, December 10, 2010
How is Jesus?
Occasionally, I run into an old college friend that I haven't seen in awhile. We talk about where we've been with our lives, our families, our careers. Usually we get around to old mutual friends, and the question will come up, "How have they been?"
Part of what I love about the age we live in is that with all the social media out there, we can keep up with old friends, and even reconnect with people we haven't seen in ages. But even with all that, there is still one thing missing. Real personal contact. That question asking how someone has been goes far beyond a tweet or a status update, its deeper than the pictures they post, but it is also a doorway to a less 'safe' relationship. To get to how people are really doing, really feeling, it means opening up our lives to theirs, and vice versa.
I began to notice something recently amongst our fellow Gate members. We talked a lot about Aggie football, a lot about new movies coming out, or new games we'd played, even some about comic books or TV shows. We spent a good deal of time talking about the things that stress us out like tests and work, and even a little time discussing how to make the church stronger and more active in service to the community. We talked about God and religion.
But someone was going the way of the old college friend we hadn't seen in a while. Sure, he was on our minds, but he was far from our conversations. I can't say if this was because we were afraid to speak his name, or if we didn't feel comfortable talking about him so personally, or if he had disappeared from our personal lives so much that we just didn't care to speak of him.
We had grown silent on Jesus.
Sure, he was mentioned in our songs and our teachings, but our day to day conversation? Not so much. Honestly, I've always found it easier to talk about God than to talk about Jesus. Yeah, they are the same guy, but God is like a title, and can be ambiguous enough to not offend. Jesus is a guy's name. It's personal. It makes him more real.
Really, I was seeing our lack of speaking of Jesus as a metaphor for how we had become spiritually. See, speaking of God is way more 'clinical,' way more religion than relationship. We can discuss theology and talk God like he is a textbook case study. We can get at the facts and the details and the historical stories. But Jesus is deeper. Jesus is about relationship. Jesus is a dude you can really get to know, and scarier yet, he can really get to know you. We as a group- all of us, including us in leadership- had chosen to discuss things of a spiritual nature in a clinical, less relational way. And we were giving in to following a religion more than a relationship.
Then one day it hit me. If Jesus is like that old college friend that we haven't spoken of or to in a while, why not ask how he's doing? So I have come up with an approach that will hopefully serve to remind us of the RELATIONSHIP we are supposed to have with Jesus. When we see each other- and I am limiting this to people in our church and other close friends I know are followers (I'm not advocating doing this to random people on the street)- I'll ask, "How is Jesus?"
It is a question meant to cover two bases. One, have you thought about Jesus at all that day. And two, because he is active in our lives, whether we know it or not, it asks what he has been doing with or teaching to us. "How is Jesus?" reminds us to think of him not as a thing to be studied, but as a person to connect with.
I hope it will mean a deeper-than-Facebook type relationship with Jesus for not only our church, but for me personally. I realize that I daily need to connect with him, not just to mark off an item on the to-do list or to learn a new fact, but to know him. Really know him. And in knowing him, to share in his life, victories and sufferings. To know him like this:
I want to know Christ—yes, to know the power of his resurrection and participation in his sufferings, becoming like him in his death, and so, somehow, attaining to the resurrection from the dead. --Philippians 3:10-11.
Part of what I love about the age we live in is that with all the social media out there, we can keep up with old friends, and even reconnect with people we haven't seen in ages. But even with all that, there is still one thing missing. Real personal contact. That question asking how someone has been goes far beyond a tweet or a status update, its deeper than the pictures they post, but it is also a doorway to a less 'safe' relationship. To get to how people are really doing, really feeling, it means opening up our lives to theirs, and vice versa.
I began to notice something recently amongst our fellow Gate members. We talked a lot about Aggie football, a lot about new movies coming out, or new games we'd played, even some about comic books or TV shows. We spent a good deal of time talking about the things that stress us out like tests and work, and even a little time discussing how to make the church stronger and more active in service to the community. We talked about God and religion.
But someone was going the way of the old college friend we hadn't seen in a while. Sure, he was on our minds, but he was far from our conversations. I can't say if this was because we were afraid to speak his name, or if we didn't feel comfortable talking about him so personally, or if he had disappeared from our personal lives so much that we just didn't care to speak of him.
We had grown silent on Jesus.
Sure, he was mentioned in our songs and our teachings, but our day to day conversation? Not so much. Honestly, I've always found it easier to talk about God than to talk about Jesus. Yeah, they are the same guy, but God is like a title, and can be ambiguous enough to not offend. Jesus is a guy's name. It's personal. It makes him more real.
Really, I was seeing our lack of speaking of Jesus as a metaphor for how we had become spiritually. See, speaking of God is way more 'clinical,' way more religion than relationship. We can discuss theology and talk God like he is a textbook case study. We can get at the facts and the details and the historical stories. But Jesus is deeper. Jesus is about relationship. Jesus is a dude you can really get to know, and scarier yet, he can really get to know you. We as a group- all of us, including us in leadership- had chosen to discuss things of a spiritual nature in a clinical, less relational way. And we were giving in to following a religion more than a relationship.
Then one day it hit me. If Jesus is like that old college friend that we haven't spoken of or to in a while, why not ask how he's doing? So I have come up with an approach that will hopefully serve to remind us of the RELATIONSHIP we are supposed to have with Jesus. When we see each other- and I am limiting this to people in our church and other close friends I know are followers (I'm not advocating doing this to random people on the street)- I'll ask, "How is Jesus?"
It is a question meant to cover two bases. One, have you thought about Jesus at all that day. And two, because he is active in our lives, whether we know it or not, it asks what he has been doing with or teaching to us. "How is Jesus?" reminds us to think of him not as a thing to be studied, but as a person to connect with.
I hope it will mean a deeper-than-Facebook type relationship with Jesus for not only our church, but for me personally. I realize that I daily need to connect with him, not just to mark off an item on the to-do list or to learn a new fact, but to know him. Really know him. And in knowing him, to share in his life, victories and sufferings. To know him like this:
I want to know Christ—yes, to know the power of his resurrection and participation in his sufferings, becoming like him in his death, and so, somehow, attaining to the resurrection from the dead. --Philippians 3:10-11.
Tuesday, December 7, 2010
Count the Bags Before You Rake the Leaves
Saturday morning, I decided to rake leaves. Our home has a little over 30 trees on the lot, and all but maybe four lose their leaves, so this is by no means a one day operation. I decided to focus on the driveway and the large space just in front of our front door (home to about 8 small to medium sized trees and some ivy). Pretty soon, I noticed how much I raked and blown up, and thought, to make it more fun, I'd see how tall a pile I could make. Plus, then the kids could play in a ginormous pile of decaying leaves. This is the result:
That is about three and a half feet tall, and about ten feet long. It is also in the middle of the driveway (that's important). The kids had a blast, but it was time to finish the job, because we had lunch to eat and a movie to get to. I go to grab the leaf bags and out falls two. That's it. I spent a bit of time looking from the bags to the pile, squarely placed in the MIDDLE of the driveway, and trying to figure out how to fit it all in the bags I had. Both of them.
In the end, I had to push the leaves I couldn't get bagged up (about 75%) off to the side so a car could get out to go get more leaf bags. And I was left remembering Jesus teaching that you needed to count the cost before you begin to build, or something to that effect. I had jumped into something very much excited, but I lacked the equipment, and the time, to complete the job.
I've seen this become a problem in so many of our lives of late. Not just when it comes to our spiritual walk, but in EVERY aspect of our lives we jump in with both feet only to discover our available resources and time don't match our excitement. So we get stressed, we sacrifice other, often important, things to finish the task we once approached with great excitement. Now, we approach it with an obligated feeling that we have to finish what we started.
I get what Jesus is saying. We need to make sure we are willing to give a job, or a calling, or a ministry, or a task all that it needs well before we drop ourselves into the commitment. We need to stop making promises that we can't keep without severely compromising the integrity of the endeavor- or the integrity of the other things we are already committed to.
Know your limits, what you can take on before you get so far in you can't get out without finishing it. Know what you have to offer before you commit what you don't have.
And please, please, count the leaf bags before blocking the driveway with a leaf mountain.
That is about three and a half feet tall, and about ten feet long. It is also in the middle of the driveway (that's important). The kids had a blast, but it was time to finish the job, because we had lunch to eat and a movie to get to. I go to grab the leaf bags and out falls two. That's it. I spent a bit of time looking from the bags to the pile, squarely placed in the MIDDLE of the driveway, and trying to figure out how to fit it all in the bags I had. Both of them.
In the end, I had to push the leaves I couldn't get bagged up (about 75%) off to the side so a car could get out to go get more leaf bags. And I was left remembering Jesus teaching that you needed to count the cost before you begin to build, or something to that effect. I had jumped into something very much excited, but I lacked the equipment, and the time, to complete the job.
I've seen this become a problem in so many of our lives of late. Not just when it comes to our spiritual walk, but in EVERY aspect of our lives we jump in with both feet only to discover our available resources and time don't match our excitement. So we get stressed, we sacrifice other, often important, things to finish the task we once approached with great excitement. Now, we approach it with an obligated feeling that we have to finish what we started.
I get what Jesus is saying. We need to make sure we are willing to give a job, or a calling, or a ministry, or a task all that it needs well before we drop ourselves into the commitment. We need to stop making promises that we can't keep without severely compromising the integrity of the endeavor- or the integrity of the other things we are already committed to.
Know your limits, what you can take on before you get so far in you can't get out without finishing it. Know what you have to offer before you commit what you don't have.
And please, please, count the leaf bags before blocking the driveway with a leaf mountain.
Thursday, December 2, 2010
Scars of Friendship
I've been scratched a great deal over the course of my life. By pets, by my kids, by thorns, and once by a high school girl basketball player during a practice our JV had with them. But for the most part, these scratches were short lived, both in their appearance and their memory. I know these things happened, but details get fuzzy and often disappear altogether.
But my scars are a different story. I still bear a scar on my right hand/forearm from running into a cattle panel (a criss-cross of 1/4 inch steel bars used for fencing). It's about 2-3 inches long, visible and I can remember the searing feeling of its first appearance. Then there is the 'Nike swoosh' I have on my left index finger. It's there because I tried to take a stainless steel sink through a too narrow door, too quickly. Several stitches later, its still there and the feeling in that finger no longer is.
Scars stick with us, they make an impact. And as unflattering as it may seem, the people in our lives are either scratches or scars. Some of them make a mark on our lives that fades and disappears. Others remain in our lives long after they have moved on.
I'll never forget guys like Jared and Donald who would stand up for me when bullies or upperclassmen came around. They were protectors when I was unable to stand for myself. The image of Morgan and Michael running up the stairs to my apartment, then sitting with me for who knows how long as I came to grips with the news that my father had just passed away is one that is permanently on my heart. A young man named Lynn, just a year my senior, visited with me at my grandfather's funeral, offering words of comfort. Just a few months later I sat at his own funeral, struck still with the poignancy of his words.
Not all scars are bad memories, though. Ask a woman who bears the scar of a C-section and you will hear a story that results in great joy. Not unlike the person who bears a scar of a surgery that saved their life. Dusty was my "Disc Golf Discipleship" buddy. Dave was my crazy roommate that still managed to challenge me to grow in Christ. Jay and Glenn were two ministers that pushed and challenged me to use my gifts for the Lord, and occasionally threw down a bit of a gauntlet that spurred me on that path.
Most of these folks I've not seen in years, and only really interacted with via Facebook and email if at all. Yet I see their faces vividly, clearly, and their words and actions are a part of my soul. They are my Scars of Friendship.
I've been looking at the state of my life lately, and I have been disappointed in the level of impact I've had on those around me. Sure, if you ask the people around me they say I have had an impact, but I doubt its of the 'scar' variety. The mark I've made will fade in time. I know there are people I have left a permanent mark on, so this isn't a call for pity or encouragement from anyone- this is a wake up call to me, and I just want to share it with you.
I pastor a very small church. We want to be unique, non-traditional, and impactful. I've worried a lot about us making an impact on the community around us, asking if our little church in a bar disappeared tomorrow, would the community miss us. Sadly the answer is no. More sad is that a new question dawned on me last night. Would the people of the Gate really miss the Gate if it were gone? Have we made a true, 'scarring' impact on each other?
This is not an earth-shattering question, but rather a question any pastor should ask about his congregation. Do my people really matter to each other- do they NEED each other? Forget pastors, every follower of Christ needs to ask this question- Do I make an impact on those closest to me- to my brothers and sisters in Christ? Or am I just a good-time buddy, a common interest sharer, or a ride on a cold night?
The people who "scarred" me went deeper than the skin. They pierced something in me that was more a core thing, a soul thing. Our little community of believers have a lot of fun seeking God- but I wonder how deeply we seek Him. Does He leave a mark on us when we encounter Him as a church?
To me, the two are tied. If I am not living to make an impact on those around me, I'm living to allow God to make His on me. We've allowed our busy lives, and our fear of getting hurt, and our less important things take away from the impact we need to have on each other. We play our relationships safe, we keep our cards close to the vest as if we were playing Go Fish with our lives. If you're lucky, and guess just right, I'll reveal a bit of myself, open a bit of myself to you.
This must change, not just in our little church, but amongst followers of Christ everywhere.
So How Do We Do It?
Do Something That Matters Together- Some of the people that 'scarred' me did so in a very dramatic event- like the loss of something dear to me. I'm not saying we need to create something like that, instead, make it a positive thing. Go on a service trip together (aka Mission Trip). This bonds people together, and deeply, like nothing I've seen. You can do short term stuff, like a day event, but for it to really make an impact, it needs to be intense if it has to be short. Helping at a food pantry is good, but it doesn't go deep. The shorter the duration of the project, the more intense it should be. Ropes Courses are good that sort of thing, as well as the service stuff.
Be Open- We're so afraid of letting others in, that we close up our doors. We wear the equivalent of body-armor in our relationships with other Christians so we don't get hurt. Part of this is we fear we'll be judged, part of it is we fear being discovered as a phony. Sometimes, we need to be expose. Sometimes, we need to get hurt by those we love (in a helpful, good way, like how a surgeon does harm to make you better).
Set the Relationship on Christ- Yes, you need to be engaged with each other because you care about the other person. But you need to care about the other person because you love Christ. Your love for them will always be flawed and imperfect- His will never fail to be perfect. This is not easy, but if you want to impact your fellow Christ Follower, Jesus must be the foundation of the relationship.
The people who have left a 'scar' on my life have done so in at least one of these ways. It is in remembering their marking of my life that I encouraged today. To be a better husband, father, pastor, and friend. I share this in hopes that you too are 'scarred' in way that makes you think deeply about the impact you have on others. If you read this and it does speak to you, share it with friends.
I have come to realize that I need to make a difference in the lives of those closest to me if I ever want to make difference in the lives of those farthest from me. My 'scars' have come from all varieties of people, but the thing they have in common is that they cared about me enough to get their hands dirty with my life. To risk their own 'scars' for the sake of my betterment. They have, in ways big and small, 'laid down their lives for their friend." (John 15:13, paraphrased)
It is high time I do the same for my friends.
But my scars are a different story. I still bear a scar on my right hand/forearm from running into a cattle panel (a criss-cross of 1/4 inch steel bars used for fencing). It's about 2-3 inches long, visible and I can remember the searing feeling of its first appearance. Then there is the 'Nike swoosh' I have on my left index finger. It's there because I tried to take a stainless steel sink through a too narrow door, too quickly. Several stitches later, its still there and the feeling in that finger no longer is.
Scars stick with us, they make an impact. And as unflattering as it may seem, the people in our lives are either scratches or scars. Some of them make a mark on our lives that fades and disappears. Others remain in our lives long after they have moved on.
I'll never forget guys like Jared and Donald who would stand up for me when bullies or upperclassmen came around. They were protectors when I was unable to stand for myself. The image of Morgan and Michael running up the stairs to my apartment, then sitting with me for who knows how long as I came to grips with the news that my father had just passed away is one that is permanently on my heart. A young man named Lynn, just a year my senior, visited with me at my grandfather's funeral, offering words of comfort. Just a few months later I sat at his own funeral, struck still with the poignancy of his words.
Not all scars are bad memories, though. Ask a woman who bears the scar of a C-section and you will hear a story that results in great joy. Not unlike the person who bears a scar of a surgery that saved their life. Dusty was my "Disc Golf Discipleship" buddy. Dave was my crazy roommate that still managed to challenge me to grow in Christ. Jay and Glenn were two ministers that pushed and challenged me to use my gifts for the Lord, and occasionally threw down a bit of a gauntlet that spurred me on that path.
Most of these folks I've not seen in years, and only really interacted with via Facebook and email if at all. Yet I see their faces vividly, clearly, and their words and actions are a part of my soul. They are my Scars of Friendship.
I've been looking at the state of my life lately, and I have been disappointed in the level of impact I've had on those around me. Sure, if you ask the people around me they say I have had an impact, but I doubt its of the 'scar' variety. The mark I've made will fade in time. I know there are people I have left a permanent mark on, so this isn't a call for pity or encouragement from anyone- this is a wake up call to me, and I just want to share it with you.
I pastor a very small church. We want to be unique, non-traditional, and impactful. I've worried a lot about us making an impact on the community around us, asking if our little church in a bar disappeared tomorrow, would the community miss us. Sadly the answer is no. More sad is that a new question dawned on me last night. Would the people of the Gate really miss the Gate if it were gone? Have we made a true, 'scarring' impact on each other?
This is not an earth-shattering question, but rather a question any pastor should ask about his congregation. Do my people really matter to each other- do they NEED each other? Forget pastors, every follower of Christ needs to ask this question- Do I make an impact on those closest to me- to my brothers and sisters in Christ? Or am I just a good-time buddy, a common interest sharer, or a ride on a cold night?
The people who "scarred" me went deeper than the skin. They pierced something in me that was more a core thing, a soul thing. Our little community of believers have a lot of fun seeking God- but I wonder how deeply we seek Him. Does He leave a mark on us when we encounter Him as a church?
To me, the two are tied. If I am not living to make an impact on those around me, I'm living to allow God to make His on me. We've allowed our busy lives, and our fear of getting hurt, and our less important things take away from the impact we need to have on each other. We play our relationships safe, we keep our cards close to the vest as if we were playing Go Fish with our lives. If you're lucky, and guess just right, I'll reveal a bit of myself, open a bit of myself to you.
This must change, not just in our little church, but amongst followers of Christ everywhere.
So How Do We Do It?
Do Something That Matters Together- Some of the people that 'scarred' me did so in a very dramatic event- like the loss of something dear to me. I'm not saying we need to create something like that, instead, make it a positive thing. Go on a service trip together (aka Mission Trip). This bonds people together, and deeply, like nothing I've seen. You can do short term stuff, like a day event, but for it to really make an impact, it needs to be intense if it has to be short. Helping at a food pantry is good, but it doesn't go deep. The shorter the duration of the project, the more intense it should be. Ropes Courses are good that sort of thing, as well as the service stuff.
Be Open- We're so afraid of letting others in, that we close up our doors. We wear the equivalent of body-armor in our relationships with other Christians so we don't get hurt. Part of this is we fear we'll be judged, part of it is we fear being discovered as a phony. Sometimes, we need to be expose. Sometimes, we need to get hurt by those we love (in a helpful, good way, like how a surgeon does harm to make you better).
Set the Relationship on Christ- Yes, you need to be engaged with each other because you care about the other person. But you need to care about the other person because you love Christ. Your love for them will always be flawed and imperfect- His will never fail to be perfect. This is not easy, but if you want to impact your fellow Christ Follower, Jesus must be the foundation of the relationship.
The people who have left a 'scar' on my life have done so in at least one of these ways. It is in remembering their marking of my life that I encouraged today. To be a better husband, father, pastor, and friend. I share this in hopes that you too are 'scarred' in way that makes you think deeply about the impact you have on others. If you read this and it does speak to you, share it with friends.
I have come to realize that I need to make a difference in the lives of those closest to me if I ever want to make difference in the lives of those farthest from me. My 'scars' have come from all varieties of people, but the thing they have in common is that they cared about me enough to get their hands dirty with my life. To risk their own 'scars' for the sake of my betterment. They have, in ways big and small, 'laid down their lives for their friend." (John 15:13, paraphrased)
It is high time I do the same for my friends.
Monday, November 29, 2010
Self Confidence
Self confidence is a tricky thing.
Too little, and you're a pushover, easily manipulated, and whiny. Too much, and you're brash, a bully, and arrogant. I've come to realize that I have this problem. I've also come to realize that often when I am in my overconfident mode, I'm really just covering up for my insecurities. I've failed at something, or made some sort of moral compromise, so I try to put on an air of bravado. And I'm a jerk so you can't see how insecure I am.
I've come to see in myself- and others as well- this sort of attempt at self-correction gone wrong. It often comes across in one (or more) of these ways:
Know It All If you think you are lacking in some way, why not try very hard to prove you are smarter than everyone else? Now, it's one thing to actually know a lot about something- but to act like you know everything is kind of annoying. I tend to get this way with my wife. Just today, while discussing something, I played the Know-It-All card. Fortunately, she called me on it. I was desperate to be right about something to validate myself. So I used fancy words and dismissive tones. I've been on the receiving end of this, as well. If you remember the old "Nick Burns, Your Company's Computer Guy" sketch from SNL-that's a pretty good picture of the Know-It-All.
I hate when I get like this- I feel like an elitist looking down on others. Really, that's what behaving as a Know-It-All is all about- making yourself feel superior so the real you doesn't prove a let down.
Cocky I was really good at this one in High School. Maybe it was because I watched Top Gun too much as a kid, but arrogant and cocky has always been a go-to self-confidence facade for me. It's like, if I tell myself "I'm Awesome" enough, then I- and everyone else- simply must believe it's true. As I've gotten older, I've come to realize this is the most transparent form of posturing. It's clear that the Cocky person is simply trying to convince themselves they have worth.
Democratic(Not the political party) Not really a course-correction thing, as much as a "I really don't know for sure, so you must be right" thing. I often see this come out in me as someone not totally agreeing with my course of action or idea- so I cave. I don't trust myself or my vision enough, so that when someone points out a flaw- real or otherwise- I become convinced that flaw IS the Achilles' Heel. I give myself the allusion of power because I am being a good leader and getting input. What's really happening is that I am terrified my leadership is weak, and will be thwarted if I don't back off this idea that clearly someone (in my mind, everyone) disagrees with.
I think we all struggle with self-confidence, at various times. And I know we have all experienced the insecure person trying to hide that fact. What I think is important is that we realize what value we actually have.
Well, duh.
It's easy to say that, but how do you do that? The church answer is of course, "I have been crucified with Christ and I no longer live, but Christ lives in me..." Galatians 2:20. That is a true statement, but what does it mean, really? It means your value need not be derived from you and what you do- it needs to be pulled from the value you have in Christ. Do you think Christ loves you? Do you think Christ is pleased with you? Do you believe He has accepted you, faults and all? If you can answer yes to those, why do YOU still need to boost your ego? If you can't answer yes, then check this out:
"There is no fear in love. But perfect love drives out fear, because fear has to do with punishment. The one who fears is not made perfect in love.
We love because he first loved us." 1 John 4:18-19.
The root of a lack of self confidence is fear. Fear that we haven't got what it takes. Fear we will be rejected. Fear we will fail. If we can realize that God loves us- how can fear rejection by Man and his standards?
So if you find you find yourself "Nick Burns-ing" it, or "Maverick-ing" it, or even being a pushover for diplomacy sake- ask why. Why are you trying to be a jerk to hide your fears about your inadequacies?
And don't be so quick to dismiss other people who point out to you when you are posturing in such a way. I've encountered people who will joke about others being this way, when in fact they themselves are doing the same stuff.
We're all a little insecure from time to time, so be accepting of that. But also, don't try to hide it. We are broken people, and we DO need to be reminded that our God has come to put us back together, to make us alright.
Too little, and you're a pushover, easily manipulated, and whiny. Too much, and you're brash, a bully, and arrogant. I've come to realize that I have this problem. I've also come to realize that often when I am in my overconfident mode, I'm really just covering up for my insecurities. I've failed at something, or made some sort of moral compromise, so I try to put on an air of bravado. And I'm a jerk so you can't see how insecure I am.
I've come to see in myself- and others as well- this sort of attempt at self-correction gone wrong. It often comes across in one (or more) of these ways:
Know It All If you think you are lacking in some way, why not try very hard to prove you are smarter than everyone else? Now, it's one thing to actually know a lot about something- but to act like you know everything is kind of annoying. I tend to get this way with my wife. Just today, while discussing something, I played the Know-It-All card. Fortunately, she called me on it. I was desperate to be right about something to validate myself. So I used fancy words and dismissive tones. I've been on the receiving end of this, as well. If you remember the old "Nick Burns, Your Company's Computer Guy" sketch from SNL-that's a pretty good picture of the Know-It-All.
I hate when I get like this- I feel like an elitist looking down on others. Really, that's what behaving as a Know-It-All is all about- making yourself feel superior so the real you doesn't prove a let down.
Cocky I was really good at this one in High School. Maybe it was because I watched Top Gun too much as a kid, but arrogant and cocky has always been a go-to self-confidence facade for me. It's like, if I tell myself "I'm Awesome" enough, then I- and everyone else- simply must believe it's true. As I've gotten older, I've come to realize this is the most transparent form of posturing. It's clear that the Cocky person is simply trying to convince themselves they have worth.
Democratic(Not the political party) Not really a course-correction thing, as much as a "I really don't know for sure, so you must be right" thing. I often see this come out in me as someone not totally agreeing with my course of action or idea- so I cave. I don't trust myself or my vision enough, so that when someone points out a flaw- real or otherwise- I become convinced that flaw IS the Achilles' Heel. I give myself the allusion of power because I am being a good leader and getting input. What's really happening is that I am terrified my leadership is weak, and will be thwarted if I don't back off this idea that clearly someone (in my mind, everyone) disagrees with.
I think we all struggle with self-confidence, at various times. And I know we have all experienced the insecure person trying to hide that fact. What I think is important is that we realize what value we actually have.
Well, duh.
It's easy to say that, but how do you do that? The church answer is of course, "I have been crucified with Christ and I no longer live, but Christ lives in me..." Galatians 2:20. That is a true statement, but what does it mean, really? It means your value need not be derived from you and what you do- it needs to be pulled from the value you have in Christ. Do you think Christ loves you? Do you think Christ is pleased with you? Do you believe He has accepted you, faults and all? If you can answer yes to those, why do YOU still need to boost your ego? If you can't answer yes, then check this out:
"There is no fear in love. But perfect love drives out fear, because fear has to do with punishment. The one who fears is not made perfect in love.
We love because he first loved us." 1 John 4:18-19.
The root of a lack of self confidence is fear. Fear that we haven't got what it takes. Fear we will be rejected. Fear we will fail. If we can realize that God loves us- how can fear rejection by Man and his standards?
So if you find you find yourself "Nick Burns-ing" it, or "Maverick-ing" it, or even being a pushover for diplomacy sake- ask why. Why are you trying to be a jerk to hide your fears about your inadequacies?
And don't be so quick to dismiss other people who point out to you when you are posturing in such a way. I've encountered people who will joke about others being this way, when in fact they themselves are doing the same stuff.
We're all a little insecure from time to time, so be accepting of that. But also, don't try to hide it. We are broken people, and we DO need to be reminded that our God has come to put us back together, to make us alright.
Monday, November 22, 2010
A Great Cloud of Witnesses
God has been really good to us lately.
Friday, we found out we had free tickets to the A&M Nebraska game. We scrambled to find someone to watch our kids so Kristin and I could go. Unfortunately, all of our normal potential baby-sitters were either going to the game themselves (31,005 students pulled tickets for the national record for most student tickets purchased), or were babysitting for someone else going to the game. Then Saturday morning, after giving up hope that we could go, Kristin's mom volunteered to drive in and watch the kids so we could. My mother-in-law is awesome.
Kristin and I rode to the game with her Uncle Fred and cousin Cheryl, so we also got great parking thanks to their being season ticket holders. Their seats were on the lower deck, and ours were on the second, so we split up to find some food then our seats.
And what seats they were. They were pretty much 50 yard line seats for potentially the biggest game of the week- certainly the biggest thus far this year for the Aggies. We were there early enough to see the march in by the Corps of Cadets, and catch the Senior night recognitions. As the promo reels and the pre-game videos began to roll, you could tell there was something special going on.
In one way, this was expected. It was a huge game, and Aggies have long been known to be super-fans. We'd already broken the student ticket record, and we soon discovered we set the record for largest crowd at Kyle Field. Statements by Nebraska's coach putting down the Aggie fans (The 12th Man) had riled up an already rowdy student section. And the Aggies were winning again, the defense was almost back to it's "Wrecking Crew" status of the decade prior, and the fans were expecting good things again for the first time in a number of years.
That's also why it was a surprise. I had only been to one game since I graduated, and it had lacked this intensity. It had been rather sedate and almost deflated. But this night it felt like the old passion that I knew from my years as a student was back, and it was wearing maroon and waving white towels.
In the midst of 90,000 plus people, yelling for their team to the point of losing their voice, I saw what passion is about. I saw it in the efforts of the young men on the field. I heard in the deafening cries of the 12th Man on defensive stands. I felt it my heart as I watched video of seasons gone by and heroes of those years. I am an Aggie, and I felt it that night. It went beyond a head knowledge that, yes I have an Aggie ring and a diploma, so I'm an Aggie. It was more than just me wearing a maroon Aggie jersey. It was more than yelling at the right times and singing the War Hymn and 'Sawing Varsity Horns Off" with the rest of the fans. It wasn't what I was doing or wearing.
It was who I was.
In the moments of tension and excitement, as the Aggies saw the Husker's final pass fall incomplete, and Ryan Tannehill took a knee to end the game- I found myself longing for more of this. Victory. Passion.
As a Christian, I learned a lot about passion Saturday night. If we were as passionate, as motivated, about Christ as we were about BTHO Nebraska- what could we accomplish? I was inspired by the 12th Man, because they- though they never set foot on the field- gave all that they could for a game that mattered.
The "game that matters" to us as followers of Christ demands our full commitment, our full passion. It demands that we wear our voices bear proclaiming Christ. It demands we adorn ourselves not with maroon and white, but with the acceptance of the blood of Christ- shed for us so that we may know Him. It demands that we stand for each other when play is close and our friends need all the support they can get to hold on just a little longer.
When the final time ran away from the clock, those white towels began to fly. Tossed upward like graduation caps, they floated a few rows down from their launching point. The celebration was not just for the team on the field, it was for all of us. We had all given of ourselves, yelled our support, stood our ground, and waved our towels. Those guys on the field gave their blood, sweat and tears, and they looked to us, their very own "great cloud of witnesses" (Hebrews 12:1) and welcomed us into their victory.
I want to be as passionate for your victory in Christ as I was for the Aggies victory on Kyle Field. I want to give my support to you, so that when your victory is won, you too will turn to me, and the rest of your "12th Man" and say, "This victory is all of ours!"
Passion is shared, and it it mutliplied in its sharing. May our passion for Christ be as contagious as a Yell from Kyle Field on Game Day.
Friday, we found out we had free tickets to the A&M Nebraska game. We scrambled to find someone to watch our kids so Kristin and I could go. Unfortunately, all of our normal potential baby-sitters were either going to the game themselves (31,005 students pulled tickets for the national record for most student tickets purchased), or were babysitting for someone else going to the game. Then Saturday morning, after giving up hope that we could go, Kristin's mom volunteered to drive in and watch the kids so we could. My mother-in-law is awesome.
Kristin and I rode to the game with her Uncle Fred and cousin Cheryl, so we also got great parking thanks to their being season ticket holders. Their seats were on the lower deck, and ours were on the second, so we split up to find some food then our seats.
And what seats they were. They were pretty much 50 yard line seats for potentially the biggest game of the week- certainly the biggest thus far this year for the Aggies. We were there early enough to see the march in by the Corps of Cadets, and catch the Senior night recognitions. As the promo reels and the pre-game videos began to roll, you could tell there was something special going on.
In one way, this was expected. It was a huge game, and Aggies have long been known to be super-fans. We'd already broken the student ticket record, and we soon discovered we set the record for largest crowd at Kyle Field. Statements by Nebraska's coach putting down the Aggie fans (The 12th Man) had riled up an already rowdy student section. And the Aggies were winning again, the defense was almost back to it's "Wrecking Crew" status of the decade prior, and the fans were expecting good things again for the first time in a number of years.
That's also why it was a surprise. I had only been to one game since I graduated, and it had lacked this intensity. It had been rather sedate and almost deflated. But this night it felt like the old passion that I knew from my years as a student was back, and it was wearing maroon and waving white towels.
In the midst of 90,000 plus people, yelling for their team to the point of losing their voice, I saw what passion is about. I saw it in the efforts of the young men on the field. I heard in the deafening cries of the 12th Man on defensive stands. I felt it my heart as I watched video of seasons gone by and heroes of those years. I am an Aggie, and I felt it that night. It went beyond a head knowledge that, yes I have an Aggie ring and a diploma, so I'm an Aggie. It was more than just me wearing a maroon Aggie jersey. It was more than yelling at the right times and singing the War Hymn and 'Sawing Varsity Horns Off" with the rest of the fans. It wasn't what I was doing or wearing.
It was who I was.
In the moments of tension and excitement, as the Aggies saw the Husker's final pass fall incomplete, and Ryan Tannehill took a knee to end the game- I found myself longing for more of this. Victory. Passion.
As a Christian, I learned a lot about passion Saturday night. If we were as passionate, as motivated, about Christ as we were about BTHO Nebraska- what could we accomplish? I was inspired by the 12th Man, because they- though they never set foot on the field- gave all that they could for a game that mattered.
The "game that matters" to us as followers of Christ demands our full commitment, our full passion. It demands that we wear our voices bear proclaiming Christ. It demands we adorn ourselves not with maroon and white, but with the acceptance of the blood of Christ- shed for us so that we may know Him. It demands that we stand for each other when play is close and our friends need all the support they can get to hold on just a little longer.
When the final time ran away from the clock, those white towels began to fly. Tossed upward like graduation caps, they floated a few rows down from their launching point. The celebration was not just for the team on the field, it was for all of us. We had all given of ourselves, yelled our support, stood our ground, and waved our towels. Those guys on the field gave their blood, sweat and tears, and they looked to us, their very own "great cloud of witnesses" (Hebrews 12:1) and welcomed us into their victory.
I want to be as passionate for your victory in Christ as I was for the Aggies victory on Kyle Field. I want to give my support to you, so that when your victory is won, you too will turn to me, and the rest of your "12th Man" and say, "This victory is all of ours!"
Passion is shared, and it it mutliplied in its sharing. May our passion for Christ be as contagious as a Yell from Kyle Field on Game Day.
Monday, November 15, 2010
Action Figures and Lessons on God's Kindness
Before I start, let me clarify that I am a grown man, and I am thoroughly confident in my adulthood.
I collect action figures. Specifically DC superheroes like Batman, Superman and Green Lantern. The specific type is often difficult to find, so there is a lot of browsing Walmart and Toys R Us (good thing I have kids to use as an excuse to go), or trying to find a cheap on-line dealer. Occasionally, they run an exclusive line to Walmart. This means if you don't find it there, good luck paying retail prices on Ebay. (Hint, it doesn't happen.) So Friday I made a run, based on the info that these things were starting to hit stores all over the country. I admit I actually prayed that they'd be there, and fully explained to God that I realized this was totally un-spiritual and sort of indulgent. There weren't any out, so I asked a sales associate if they knew when any might come in. She went to check, and ten minutes later she returned with a box containing just what I was looking for. I was so glad to have just saved a ton of time and gas trying to catch these elusive plastic heroes and I thanked the nice lady, and made my purchase.
Then, I remembered my prayer. And I realized that God's kindness isn't always in the form of the super-spiritual. How often have you found a parking spot right there at the door that was open? Or gotten a random check in the mail when you needed it? Or heard a favorite song just when you were needing it?
The truth is, God cares about what makes you happy. He doesn't always make it happen, but He loves to see you smile. Every now and then, He gives you that little cherry on top- that "I know you'll like this!" type of kindness.
I know some people will say these things are just coincidence, or random things happening. And you can believe that, but I choose to believe that there is a personal God who loves me. A God who desires to show me kindness, even in the inconsequential things. And why would God show so much kindness?
" Or do you show contempt for the riches of his kindness, forbearance and patience, not realizing that God’s kindness is intended to lead you to repentance?" --Romans 2:4
Paul is saying God puts off His wrath to show His kindness so that you'll repent. Why stop at just the withholding of wrath as His demonstration of kindness? Jesus would kindly allow an adulteress to live, and nudged her toward repentance. He was kind to Zacchaeus, who then made his tax collector indiscretions right.
When I found those un-important action figures, it showed me God cared. And if God cared about the little things in my life, maybe I should to. Those little moments of indulging in sin needed to be paid attention to. God cared enough to try to make me smile with a little thing, maybe I should care enough to honor Him in the little things.
So, I thanked God for the action figures. And for His kindness.
I collect action figures. Specifically DC superheroes like Batman, Superman and Green Lantern. The specific type is often difficult to find, so there is a lot of browsing Walmart and Toys R Us (good thing I have kids to use as an excuse to go), or trying to find a cheap on-line dealer. Occasionally, they run an exclusive line to Walmart. This means if you don't find it there, good luck paying retail prices on Ebay. (Hint, it doesn't happen.) So Friday I made a run, based on the info that these things were starting to hit stores all over the country. I admit I actually prayed that they'd be there, and fully explained to God that I realized this was totally un-spiritual and sort of indulgent. There weren't any out, so I asked a sales associate if they knew when any might come in. She went to check, and ten minutes later she returned with a box containing just what I was looking for. I was so glad to have just saved a ton of time and gas trying to catch these elusive plastic heroes and I thanked the nice lady, and made my purchase.
Then, I remembered my prayer. And I realized that God's kindness isn't always in the form of the super-spiritual. How often have you found a parking spot right there at the door that was open? Or gotten a random check in the mail when you needed it? Or heard a favorite song just when you were needing it?
The truth is, God cares about what makes you happy. He doesn't always make it happen, but He loves to see you smile. Every now and then, He gives you that little cherry on top- that "I know you'll like this!" type of kindness.
I know some people will say these things are just coincidence, or random things happening. And you can believe that, but I choose to believe that there is a personal God who loves me. A God who desires to show me kindness, even in the inconsequential things. And why would God show so much kindness?
" Or do you show contempt for the riches of his kindness, forbearance and patience, not realizing that God’s kindness is intended to lead you to repentance?" --Romans 2:4
Paul is saying God puts off His wrath to show His kindness so that you'll repent. Why stop at just the withholding of wrath as His demonstration of kindness? Jesus would kindly allow an adulteress to live, and nudged her toward repentance. He was kind to Zacchaeus, who then made his tax collector indiscretions right.
When I found those un-important action figures, it showed me God cared. And if God cared about the little things in my life, maybe I should to. Those little moments of indulging in sin needed to be paid attention to. God cared enough to try to make me smile with a little thing, maybe I should care enough to honor Him in the little things.
So, I thanked God for the action figures. And for His kindness.
Tuesday, November 9, 2010
Desperate Revolution
"The mass of men lead lives of quiet desperation."
- Henry David Thoreau
If revolution is birthed in belief, then it is most certainly conceived in desperation. Thoreau was, whether he realized it or not, conceiving a revolution that is alive and kicking today. So many people are resigned to a life that is less than what they expected it would be. Dreams they held on to as they entered college and even the post-college world have disappeared. To paraphrase a Caedman's Call song, the optimism of our youth is dead and gone.
What happened? Did we get bogged down in the intricasies of adulthood- the responsibilities that we failed to see in all our dreaming? Did we get told 'No!' by our elders enough that we started to believe we couldn't change the world? Or did the dream just prove to be too grand to become reality?
Maybe all, maybe something else entirely. But the simple truth is, there are a lot of people I know that look at life and think, "This is not what I expected, and it's too late to change that now." They are resigned to life as they know it. Yet they are desperate to really live. It is in this desperation for renewed vigor, new chances to reclaim old glories, that revolutions are conceived.
But not all revolutions are for the best.
A mid-life crisis that sees you ditching your marriage, or going into debt to own that ridiculously cool sports car is not the kind of revolution we should want. A revolution that is not thought out and leads to you quitting a job with no other way to provide for the family is not advised either- unless of course God is telling you to do it. And He better be REAL clear on that.
I have reached a point of quiet desperation that lead to a revolution. Actually, there have been several. Most recently, I have become desperate to matter. I don't want to be just another cog in the wheel of the world- I want to make a difference. I have become desperate to show those around me that there is more to life than just getting a good job and doing the 'right thing' as society defines it. I am desperate to see the college students I serve really live, and never take no for an answer when it comes to what God places on their hearts.
I was once an idealistic young minister. I thought I could change the town I served. I was told, blatantly and implicitly, that that would never happen. Repeatedly. I was told that most ministers do their duty and never make a wave beyond a small group of people. I was told that this was a great work, for ministers to make a small impact.
I resigned myself to quiet desperation that I would never make a large impact- despite my dreams to the contrary. I lived in this state for many years and through two ministry fields. But one day, my desperation to reach a people that could still change things was birthed into a revolution. I realized that the people with the most desire, the most passion to change things were those whose optimism had not been assaulted by 'wisdom' from their elders to the point of exhaustion. They still held fast to hope, they still expected things.
My revolution would be dressed in a non-tradtional church, it would meet in a bar, it would be young. But at it's heart would be this thought: "God is bigger than our doubts, fears, and cynicism." My revolution was that the young adults who knew Christ could and should lead and guide their church while they still had optimism. Rather than waiting until they were 'old enough,' they would lead now. Their energy and excitement would be harnassed and encouraged.
It hasn't been easy, and we still aren't where my dream of revolution needs to be, but I am seeing a growing collection of Revolutionaries surrounding me. Some are deep in thier faith, others are still young. Some had already been bitten by the cynicism bug, and are fighting to be free of it. But I believe these people I've come to love can CHANGE things.
I believe it because they are changing me. My 'quiet desperation' has conceived a belief, a faith in Christ deeper than any time in my since I was in college- not unlike those Revolutionaries I know. It is only a matter of time until we give birth to a Revolution that changes those closest to us- and God willing, the city we live in.
This is why we are left on this Earth after being rescued by Jesus. Not to give in to 'quiet desperation' and acceptance that life just isn't getting any better. No, we are here to be His Revolution- to call those wandering to come back to Him, to find those who are lost, and lead the way for those who are blind.
We are to be the Revolution we are desperate for.
- Henry David Thoreau
If revolution is birthed in belief, then it is most certainly conceived in desperation. Thoreau was, whether he realized it or not, conceiving a revolution that is alive and kicking today. So many people are resigned to a life that is less than what they expected it would be. Dreams they held on to as they entered college and even the post-college world have disappeared. To paraphrase a Caedman's Call song, the optimism of our youth is dead and gone.
What happened? Did we get bogged down in the intricasies of adulthood- the responsibilities that we failed to see in all our dreaming? Did we get told 'No!' by our elders enough that we started to believe we couldn't change the world? Or did the dream just prove to be too grand to become reality?
Maybe all, maybe something else entirely. But the simple truth is, there are a lot of people I know that look at life and think, "This is not what I expected, and it's too late to change that now." They are resigned to life as they know it. Yet they are desperate to really live. It is in this desperation for renewed vigor, new chances to reclaim old glories, that revolutions are conceived.
But not all revolutions are for the best.
A mid-life crisis that sees you ditching your marriage, or going into debt to own that ridiculously cool sports car is not the kind of revolution we should want. A revolution that is not thought out and leads to you quitting a job with no other way to provide for the family is not advised either- unless of course God is telling you to do it. And He better be REAL clear on that.
I have reached a point of quiet desperation that lead to a revolution. Actually, there have been several. Most recently, I have become desperate to matter. I don't want to be just another cog in the wheel of the world- I want to make a difference. I have become desperate to show those around me that there is more to life than just getting a good job and doing the 'right thing' as society defines it. I am desperate to see the college students I serve really live, and never take no for an answer when it comes to what God places on their hearts.
I was once an idealistic young minister. I thought I could change the town I served. I was told, blatantly and implicitly, that that would never happen. Repeatedly. I was told that most ministers do their duty and never make a wave beyond a small group of people. I was told that this was a great work, for ministers to make a small impact.
I resigned myself to quiet desperation that I would never make a large impact- despite my dreams to the contrary. I lived in this state for many years and through two ministry fields. But one day, my desperation to reach a people that could still change things was birthed into a revolution. I realized that the people with the most desire, the most passion to change things were those whose optimism had not been assaulted by 'wisdom' from their elders to the point of exhaustion. They still held fast to hope, they still expected things.
My revolution would be dressed in a non-tradtional church, it would meet in a bar, it would be young. But at it's heart would be this thought: "God is bigger than our doubts, fears, and cynicism." My revolution was that the young adults who knew Christ could and should lead and guide their church while they still had optimism. Rather than waiting until they were 'old enough,' they would lead now. Their energy and excitement would be harnassed and encouraged.
It hasn't been easy, and we still aren't where my dream of revolution needs to be, but I am seeing a growing collection of Revolutionaries surrounding me. Some are deep in thier faith, others are still young. Some had already been bitten by the cynicism bug, and are fighting to be free of it. But I believe these people I've come to love can CHANGE things.
I believe it because they are changing me. My 'quiet desperation' has conceived a belief, a faith in Christ deeper than any time in my since I was in college- not unlike those Revolutionaries I know. It is only a matter of time until we give birth to a Revolution that changes those closest to us- and God willing, the city we live in.
This is why we are left on this Earth after being rescued by Jesus. Not to give in to 'quiet desperation' and acceptance that life just isn't getting any better. No, we are here to be His Revolution- to call those wandering to come back to Him, to find those who are lost, and lead the way for those who are blind.
We are to be the Revolution we are desperate for.
Monday, November 8, 2010
Believing Revolution
We all want something to believe in. It is the rallying cry of the Human Race. We seek something to believe, whether it is science or religion, something out there or something inside us, or even just ourselves. And we want others to believe in us, which is why we often work so hard to fit in. Belief makes the world go 'round.
The problem of late is that there is so much to believe in. I mean, there is so much "truth" to be found that it is hard for us to choose just one. So, we have created this concept- moral relativism. Simplified, it means "Do what feels right to you." It works great for a while because there is no wrong answer. Well, unless you do something that makes you feel bad, but then the punishment comes from you and not some outside source. But over time, many moral relativist (many, not all) find that they really don't believe in anything, and they start their search all over.
The church, as well, has found itself in a place where, like the song says, we need "something to believe in, because I'm living just to breathe." The belief that believers seek is not some concept- but actually a way of life. They realize that for at least a generation the church has grown its roots into the floor, she has grown sedentary. By extension, followers of Christ seem to have adopted a rather lazy view of spirituality. They don't want to sacrifice to know Christ, they don't want to be told their lifestyle doesn't honor Jesus, they don't really want to take a stand for Him other than to maybe wear a cross or a T-shirt. It has been safe, easy, and -in America, at least- expected that you are a 'Christian,' as if it is by birthright. Moral Relativism has crept in so that Christians do what they feel is right, not what God has shown He desires. But Moral Relativism is but a symptom of the real problem.
We don't believe.
Yeah, we know there is a God. We know He died for us and blah, blah, blah...but man, I'm really too busy for a meaningful relationship. If God were a girlfriend, we would have dumped Him years ago because there just wasn't a spark anymore. We know about Him, but He doesn't really live to us. A big part of this problem is that we don't see too many followers of Christ that are genuinely passionate about Him. We hear stories of believers in far off lands, but here in America, our "Christian Examples" are celebrity pastors and writers who tell us a lot about how we should live sacrificially while they sit in their large churches with top-notch tech. I don't find myself getting excited to believe in their God.
And so, we are lethargic. We believe there is a God, but we are still simply living just to breathe, to make it to the next paycheck, to eek out a decent grade on that test, to try to avoid another fight with the significant other about finances or the kids or what to watch on TV. We believe, but we do nothing with it. And we complain that our nation is going to Hell because no one will stand up for Christ.
We want a Revolutionary- someone to shake us from our apathy. But we need them to explain things step by step, we need to know exact answers, exact facts, for we don't want to step out on faith if we might fall. We are fearful and mistrusting of the God we believe in.
So what is the answer?
We need to be the Revolutionary we seek. Not Big Time Pastor. Not Emergent Church Writer. Not Celebrity Turned Christian. US. YOU and ME. The way to do it is to listen to the gentle voice, the almost silent whisper that comes from deep in our heart- that feeling that there must be more than this, more than this nothing that our faith has become.
Our belief must not simply rest on itself. It must grow to a fever- a passion- if we are going to see a change in not only ourselves, but our world. Change based simply on facts without passion has never truly been seen, at least to my knowledge, because Revolutionaries are passionate.
Dispassionate revolution brings no change.
And that is just what we have today. People are passionate about changing government, health care, immigration, and the economy. But we talk about wanting to change the state of faith in our nation, and we turn all clinical, emotionless.
Wake up. Come alive and fight with all that you have to get a glimpse of Christ. Be willing to shed blood, sweat and tears in your pursuit of Him. Let everything else fade away, realize that everything else- even the good things like family and doing a good job at school or work- are lesser things than knowing God.
Be willing to be seen as a Freak for believing so totally in God. Be willing to do something that others think insane or unsafe if it is God calling you to it. Weep when you sing a love song to God or when you hear the story of another Child of God. Be broken when you see others, even enemies, fall. Be torn up inside over the struggles others face. When you yourself fall, allow yourself to be picked up by God, not through a set of man-made redemption steps.
It is time to start believing in Revolution. And it is time to start a revolution int your own beliefs.
Thursday, November 4, 2010
God OR Country?
Does being a Christian mean you have to be a patriot? And really, just what is a patriot, anyway? Dictionary.com has it this way:
–noun
1. a person who loves, supports, and defends his or her country and its interests with devotion.
2. a person who regards himself or herself as a defender, esp. of individual rights, against presumed interference by the federal government.
3. ( initial capital letter ) Military . a U.S. Army antiaircraft missile with a range of 37 mi. (60 km) and a 200-lb. (90 kg) warhead, launched from a tracked vehicle with radar and computer guidance and fire control.
As cool as the missile definition sounds, I'm really sticking with the first one for the purposes of this entry.
Election Season ended here in America on Tuesday. Well, actually one ended and another began, but that's irrelevant. It ended with a lot of people who say they love God and Country thanking supporters and promising to work hard for the good of the people. This sounds really good, and we Christians seem to eat up all the God talk from our favorite candidate, but something is bothering me.
I worry that we have become stronger patriots for the US than we have for God.
"Christian" Nation?
Much talk has been bandied about for the last few years about the Christian-ness of our nation. I believe the foundations of our nation were based on the freedom of a people to seek God as they see fit, and I also believe that many of the people who fought to make that way of life possible a couple hundred years ago were Christians. Most. Not all.
I believe that the vast majority of Americans call themselves Christian. Just because I call myself an Aggie does not mean I'm on the team that plays on Saturday. So, I believe that while between 80 and 90 % of us say we are Christians, the way we live our lives does not validate that.
There is no doubt that the Judeo-Christian worldview has a huge role in the laws we follow. Many of the Ten Commandments are represented in some form or another in our legal system today- but that does not make us a Christian nation.
Our founders set out to create a great nation, and I believe they succeeded. But over the 234 years since then, we have seemed to adopt this attitude that we are God's Chosen People. Like Israel. Honestly, I think its this view that makes us think we're a Christian nation. We have come to believe we are entitled to God's favor, but not His Lordship (aka His guidance and direction for living).
It's Happened Before
Israel started out great under Saul. Then Saul tanked it. David picked up the pieces, and despite numerous failings, built an awesome and God centered nation. But throughout its lifespan, Israel seemed to feel entitled to God's favor, but not His Lordship and definitely not His Discipline.
Just the other day, I randomly opened my Bible to Jeremiah 37. I read through chapter 39, which contains the fall of Jerusalem, and effectively the end of the nation of Judah (and ultimately Israel as a whole). It's too long to copy here, so go read it, its interesting. But I'll sum it up.
Zedekiah was made a puppet king by the king of Babylon while Jerusalem was under siege. He was not listening to God, so he sent for Jeremiah to pray for them. Jeremiah came back and said that God told him even though Egypt was marching to their aid, they would go home and the Babylonians would come back and destroy everything.
Then Jeremiah was thrown in prison because he was viewed as a deserter for going to check on his land. He again told the king that Babylon would take the king prisoner, and asked why he was imprisoned while the prophets who had told him that things would never get this bad for the Great Nation were free. (By Hebrew law, false prophets were to be stoned- by rocks.) Jeremiah gets to then live in the guards' courtyard and eat bread. Awesome. There, he prophesies that those who desert to Babylon will live, but those who stay will die.
They throw him in an empty, muddy well, where he sinks. But the king has him pulled out and asks him again for guidance. Jeremiah again says, "Give yourself up to Babylon or you will see Jerusalem burn, and you and your family may not live." The king seems to listen, at least to ponder this, but then in chapter 39, he is still doing things his way. The wall falls. The king runs. The Babylonians catch him, kill his sons and the nobles of Israel before his eyes. Then they take his eyes.
Jeremiah is freed by the Babylonians, but God's prophecy is declared that because the nation failed to heed His words, it would see disaster, not prosperity.
What Does That Have to do With the US?
The patriots- those prophets who though Israel and Judah to great to fall- were wrong. They had placed their faith in the nation, not the God. They had grown too proud to see that the king could not save them, nor could the nobles and the army save them. Jeremiah spoke something truly unpatriotic- give up and take the punishment you have earned. Let your proud city fall, but keep your life and the chance to seek forgiveness and restoration.
I am not anti-American, and I am certainly not claiming any prophecy that America will fall. But she can. We are a people that express the entitlement of being God's people without accepting His guidance. I'm not talking about the politicians here, I'm talking about we Christians. We demand moral uprightness of our leaders without demanding it of ourselves. We grow angry that our President doesn't attend church very often, but most Americans don't either. The ideal of America is deemed more worthy of fighting for than the reality of God. Oh, we'd never say that outright, but our actions dictate it. If we were as vociferous in our love for God as we are for expressing our desire to "return America to the right values," then I might give us credit. But it seems to me we expect America to still be prosperous and powerful because we are a "Christian Nation."
Yet we do not pledge allegiance to God, unless we need something. What if God told you, like He told Jeremiah, that you should leave behind your country, because it must fall for it's failures? Could you turn your back on your country?
Because, for Jeremiah and his contemporaries, to choose Country was to reject God.
I love my country and all that it provides for me. But I love my God more. And for all our talk of "Restoring America," it comes to nothing if we don't first "Restore our Relationship with God."
Each and every one of us.
–noun
1. a person who loves, supports, and defends his or her country and its interests with devotion.
2. a person who regards himself or herself as a defender, esp. of individual rights, against presumed interference by the federal government.
3. ( initial capital letter ) Military . a U.S. Army antiaircraft missile with a range of 37 mi. (60 km) and a 200-lb. (90 kg) warhead, launched from a tracked vehicle with radar and computer guidance and fire control.
As cool as the missile definition sounds, I'm really sticking with the first one for the purposes of this entry.
Election Season ended here in America on Tuesday. Well, actually one ended and another began, but that's irrelevant. It ended with a lot of people who say they love God and Country thanking supporters and promising to work hard for the good of the people. This sounds really good, and we Christians seem to eat up all the God talk from our favorite candidate, but something is bothering me.
I worry that we have become stronger patriots for the US than we have for God.
"Christian" Nation?
Much talk has been bandied about for the last few years about the Christian-ness of our nation. I believe the foundations of our nation were based on the freedom of a people to seek God as they see fit, and I also believe that many of the people who fought to make that way of life possible a couple hundred years ago were Christians. Most. Not all.
I believe that the vast majority of Americans call themselves Christian. Just because I call myself an Aggie does not mean I'm on the team that plays on Saturday. So, I believe that while between 80 and 90 % of us say we are Christians, the way we live our lives does not validate that.
There is no doubt that the Judeo-Christian worldview has a huge role in the laws we follow. Many of the Ten Commandments are represented in some form or another in our legal system today- but that does not make us a Christian nation.
Our founders set out to create a great nation, and I believe they succeeded. But over the 234 years since then, we have seemed to adopt this attitude that we are God's Chosen People. Like Israel. Honestly, I think its this view that makes us think we're a Christian nation. We have come to believe we are entitled to God's favor, but not His Lordship (aka His guidance and direction for living).
It's Happened Before
Israel started out great under Saul. Then Saul tanked it. David picked up the pieces, and despite numerous failings, built an awesome and God centered nation. But throughout its lifespan, Israel seemed to feel entitled to God's favor, but not His Lordship and definitely not His Discipline.
Just the other day, I randomly opened my Bible to Jeremiah 37. I read through chapter 39, which contains the fall of Jerusalem, and effectively the end of the nation of Judah (and ultimately Israel as a whole). It's too long to copy here, so go read it, its interesting. But I'll sum it up.
Zedekiah was made a puppet king by the king of Babylon while Jerusalem was under siege. He was not listening to God, so he sent for Jeremiah to pray for them. Jeremiah came back and said that God told him even though Egypt was marching to their aid, they would go home and the Babylonians would come back and destroy everything.
Then Jeremiah was thrown in prison because he was viewed as a deserter for going to check on his land. He again told the king that Babylon would take the king prisoner, and asked why he was imprisoned while the prophets who had told him that things would never get this bad for the Great Nation were free. (By Hebrew law, false prophets were to be stoned- by rocks.) Jeremiah gets to then live in the guards' courtyard and eat bread. Awesome. There, he prophesies that those who desert to Babylon will live, but those who stay will die.
They throw him in an empty, muddy well, where he sinks. But the king has him pulled out and asks him again for guidance. Jeremiah again says, "Give yourself up to Babylon or you will see Jerusalem burn, and you and your family may not live." The king seems to listen, at least to ponder this, but then in chapter 39, he is still doing things his way. The wall falls. The king runs. The Babylonians catch him, kill his sons and the nobles of Israel before his eyes. Then they take his eyes.
Jeremiah is freed by the Babylonians, but God's prophecy is declared that because the nation failed to heed His words, it would see disaster, not prosperity.
What Does That Have to do With the US?
The patriots- those prophets who though Israel and Judah to great to fall- were wrong. They had placed their faith in the nation, not the God. They had grown too proud to see that the king could not save them, nor could the nobles and the army save them. Jeremiah spoke something truly unpatriotic- give up and take the punishment you have earned. Let your proud city fall, but keep your life and the chance to seek forgiveness and restoration.
I am not anti-American, and I am certainly not claiming any prophecy that America will fall. But she can. We are a people that express the entitlement of being God's people without accepting His guidance. I'm not talking about the politicians here, I'm talking about we Christians. We demand moral uprightness of our leaders without demanding it of ourselves. We grow angry that our President doesn't attend church very often, but most Americans don't either. The ideal of America is deemed more worthy of fighting for than the reality of God. Oh, we'd never say that outright, but our actions dictate it. If we were as vociferous in our love for God as we are for expressing our desire to "return America to the right values," then I might give us credit. But it seems to me we expect America to still be prosperous and powerful because we are a "Christian Nation."
Yet we do not pledge allegiance to God, unless we need something. What if God told you, like He told Jeremiah, that you should leave behind your country, because it must fall for it's failures? Could you turn your back on your country?
Because, for Jeremiah and his contemporaries, to choose Country was to reject God.
I love my country and all that it provides for me. But I love my God more. And for all our talk of "Restoring America," it comes to nothing if we don't first "Restore our Relationship with God."
Each and every one of us.
Tuesday, November 2, 2010
Busy-ness Kryptonite
Me: Hey, I'd love to get together sometime soon to talk ministry stuff with you.
Pastor Friend: I'm busy until next week, how about Wednesday.
Me. I'm out of town. Friday?
Pastor Friend: No, I'm booked. How about the middle of next month? I've got tons of stuff to do, meetings and conferences. You know.
---------------------------------------
Me: So, how are things going in your relationship with God?
Student: OK, it's just lately, with school and tests coming up, I just haven't had time to do much reading or praying.
---------------------------------------
It's not moral relativism. It's not politics or causes. It's not even heresy and denominational strife that is killing the church.
It's Busy-ness.
These conversations are very common these days. I have them all the time. I've been the one making excuses for why I can't meet, or why my life has gotten too hectic to stop for 10 minutes to read the Bible. Being busy has become the cancer eating way at Christianity. It is our kryptonite.
I find it odd that we live in a world where technology has made everything move faster- cars, communication, work. Yet, we seem to have less time than ever. I remember being in college and being told to enjoy all the free time you have now, it'll never be like that again. Now, the students I know seem to never have time. I am always hearing that this test is coming, or that projects deadline is looming, or etc. They have legitimate concerns about doing well in school to get a good job, but I am starting to wonder: At what cost?
The hectic pace of life so many of us live leads to a complacency of faith. Which breeds apathy toward Christ. Which leaves us dead. We have given at the office, at school, even to our families so much that we have nothing left for God.
We need a Revolution.
It takes work to maintain a good relationship, and a good relationship needs to be growing. With Christ, we have sat ourselves down and put out roots. We have 'gotten saved' or been rescued by Christ, and we feel that is good enough. Sometimes its an issue of thinking that we've gotten heaven, why put in any extra effort? I need to work harder to succeed in school or at work, but I don't need to work harder at knowing and pursuing God.
We are abusing grace. And we are being selfish.
Our relationship with God is not ours only. My faith affects my wife, children, friends and co-workers- the list goes on. When I am apathetic or complacent in faith and the acting out of said faith, I am not giving them my best. That's to say nothing of my sub-par worship to God. We have taken to heart this idea that "My faith is personal," which is true- but its not the whole story. My relationship with God- what we talk about, what He convicts me of and encourages me with- is very much personal. But how that relationship changes me (and it must change me or it is not a vital relationship) does affect those around me. If I am sleeping, they are not challenged or pushed in their faith. But if I am energized, engaged, dare I say revolutionized? Then my faith begins to breathe into them. They too come alive.
I want to be a revolutionary Christian not so I can feel good about my personal faith, but so I can see others come fully alive. Saint Irenaeus said "The Glory of God is man fully alive." I want to be fully alive, and I want to lead others to that state, to bring glory to God.
I look around at my fellow Christ followers and see more people weighed down by the stresses of school, work, family and just general busy-ness than I see people buoyed by a vibrant faith in Christ. I want to see us stop trying to find a way to fit God into our lives, and start trying to find a way to work our lives around God. I'm not advocating setting aside three hour prayer sessions, or 24 hour Bible readings, I'm just saying if we care as much about seeking God as we do about getting a grade or meeting a deadline or watching that show, we might be a little different. We might see those stresses through the eyes of God, and thus see them as they are.
So, I challenge you. Find time to spend with God. Make Him of first importance. Before studying. Before work. Before family time. All of these endeavors will be made more fruitful if done as secondary to pursuing God.
We are desperate for something to believe. For something that makes us realize that there is something worth living for, something worth striving for. We need a Revolution of Faith.
So be the Revolutionary in your life.
Seek Him.
First.
Pastor Friend: I'm busy until next week, how about Wednesday.
Me. I'm out of town. Friday?
Pastor Friend: No, I'm booked. How about the middle of next month? I've got tons of stuff to do, meetings and conferences. You know.
---------------------------------------
Me: So, how are things going in your relationship with God?
Student: OK, it's just lately, with school and tests coming up, I just haven't had time to do much reading or praying.
---------------------------------------
It's not moral relativism. It's not politics or causes. It's not even heresy and denominational strife that is killing the church.
It's Busy-ness.
These conversations are very common these days. I have them all the time. I've been the one making excuses for why I can't meet, or why my life has gotten too hectic to stop for 10 minutes to read the Bible. Being busy has become the cancer eating way at Christianity. It is our kryptonite.
I find it odd that we live in a world where technology has made everything move faster- cars, communication, work. Yet, we seem to have less time than ever. I remember being in college and being told to enjoy all the free time you have now, it'll never be like that again. Now, the students I know seem to never have time. I am always hearing that this test is coming, or that projects deadline is looming, or etc. They have legitimate concerns about doing well in school to get a good job, but I am starting to wonder: At what cost?
The hectic pace of life so many of us live leads to a complacency of faith. Which breeds apathy toward Christ. Which leaves us dead. We have given at the office, at school, even to our families so much that we have nothing left for God.
We need a Revolution.
It takes work to maintain a good relationship, and a good relationship needs to be growing. With Christ, we have sat ourselves down and put out roots. We have 'gotten saved' or been rescued by Christ, and we feel that is good enough. Sometimes its an issue of thinking that we've gotten heaven, why put in any extra effort? I need to work harder to succeed in school or at work, but I don't need to work harder at knowing and pursuing God.
We are abusing grace. And we are being selfish.
Our relationship with God is not ours only. My faith affects my wife, children, friends and co-workers- the list goes on. When I am apathetic or complacent in faith and the acting out of said faith, I am not giving them my best. That's to say nothing of my sub-par worship to God. We have taken to heart this idea that "My faith is personal," which is true- but its not the whole story. My relationship with God- what we talk about, what He convicts me of and encourages me with- is very much personal. But how that relationship changes me (and it must change me or it is not a vital relationship) does affect those around me. If I am sleeping, they are not challenged or pushed in their faith. But if I am energized, engaged, dare I say revolutionized? Then my faith begins to breathe into them. They too come alive.
I want to be a revolutionary Christian not so I can feel good about my personal faith, but so I can see others come fully alive. Saint Irenaeus said "The Glory of God is man fully alive." I want to be fully alive, and I want to lead others to that state, to bring glory to God.
I look around at my fellow Christ followers and see more people weighed down by the stresses of school, work, family and just general busy-ness than I see people buoyed by a vibrant faith in Christ. I want to see us stop trying to find a way to fit God into our lives, and start trying to find a way to work our lives around God. I'm not advocating setting aside three hour prayer sessions, or 24 hour Bible readings, I'm just saying if we care as much about seeking God as we do about getting a grade or meeting a deadline or watching that show, we might be a little different. We might see those stresses through the eyes of God, and thus see them as they are.
So, I challenge you. Find time to spend with God. Make Him of first importance. Before studying. Before work. Before family time. All of these endeavors will be made more fruitful if done as secondary to pursuing God.
We are desperate for something to believe. For something that makes us realize that there is something worth living for, something worth striving for. We need a Revolution of Faith.
So be the Revolutionary in your life.
Seek Him.
First.
Wednesday, October 27, 2010
The Dichotomy of Glory
You know how you pray for God to break you? I never knew just how much that meant your emotions and heart could be be literally torn in two different directions. This week, I have been experiencing this strange division of thought, both first hand and in the lives of friends. As I was praying about the whirlwind I found myself in, this idea of the Dichotomy of Glory rose up.
How glory can be found in two opposite things, at the same time.
How God can be lifted up by polarized events.
Life and Death
Yesterday, I went to the hospital to visit my friends (and co-Gate leaders) Wally and Crissy. They had just become proud parents of a sleepy (for the moment) baby boy named Liam. I walked into a room filled with family and friends of the new Mom and Dad, and gazed into their smiling, beaming faces as I shook hands and introduced myself. Then, in the faces of Wally and Crissy, I saw another dichotomy- a strange but familiar mixture of excitement and exhaustion. Every hospital room I've ever entered with the intent of congratulating new parents has held the same expression my friends held. After a long sleepless and uncomfortable night, a new joy was here. As much as they said they were exhausted and couldn't wait to sleep, I knew they would just as soon spend the next week gazing at this little miracle they could call their own.
I walked into my home, just a few minutes later, and saw Kristin sitting at the computer, tears in her eyes. Before I could tell here about what I had just seen, she informed me that another couple that we are friends with, Jay and Amanda, had just lost their baby. Jay and Amanda are also friends with Wally and Crissy, so the fact that two groups of people we know would experience the opposite ends of a similar event on the same day left us questioning: How could this be?
On one hand, God has been glorified by the miracle of birth and thankfulness of one family, but He has also been glorified by the tragedy of another. Over the last day, Amanda and Jay have been an amazing example of faith and trust in a sometimes incomprehensible God. They have turned to Him, they have trusted in Him. They have glorified Him.
No, it doesn't make sense. I rejoice with Wally and Crissy. But I grieve with Jay and Amanda. With both, we must trust God. I think another of our friends, Michelle, said it best: "Celebrating today with a dear friend for the birth of her son. Mourning today with a dear friend for the loss of her son. Two friends. Same God. I have no words."
It is at times like this where we don't know what to say. Often, I simply want to say, "I have nothing to offer but my prayers and my God. May they be sufficient."
Duty and Passion
I have a real job. It's purpose is to pay the bills to enable us to lead our church. It is not my passion, nor even an interest of mine. It is a gift of God and came just when we needed it. Over the last three years, I have built relationships, and I have done my duty. Occasionally I've done a real good job. I don't wake up excited to go to work, but I try to do the best I can at it. When I succeed at this and at sharing my life and love for Christ with my co-workers, God is glorified.
For the past month or so, I have been meeting with some guys. Four different guys, four different types of conversations, four very uplifting times for me. Because I see God working in their lives, I am being challenged in my faith. My vision for serving Christ through the Gate has awakened. My passion for His calling on my life has burned brighter, and more intense than it has since we first set out to begin this journey three years ago. I have desire to write, and want to do it more and more. I want to publish a book I've written. I want to meet more people. I want to work hard at making the Gate an entity that points to God by reaching those farthest from Him. My passion is awakened, this glorifies God.
I am now torn between glorifying God by doing a good job at my "real job" and glorifying God by pursuing the passion He sent me here for. The problem is that neither is happening the best they can because I am divided. Can I do both? I've been good at doing one real well to the detriment of the other, or doing both in a mediocre way. That doesn't glorify God.
Safety or Jump
So here I am. Torn. God can be glorified by life or death. God can be glorified by duty or passion. For me, the question is, can I glorify God by staying in the safe place, with my job, or do I have to take a leap of faith? I know of a lot of people who can balance the bi-vocational life, but can I?
The last time I took a leap of faith, a real jump, was when we moved to College Station to start the Gate. We left the safety of an established ministry for the uncertainty of a brand new bar church for college students. It has been the toughest thing I have ever done, but in many ways, through numerous relationships, I believe it may have brought more glory to God than anything else I have ever done.
I think about the glory I saw on display yesterday. The glory of a newborn child and the glory of a grieving family enveloped in the arms of Christ. I shared with them their glory: smiles for the new baby and tears for the one lost.
As C. S. Lewis said, "The load, or weight, or burden, of my neighbour's glory should be laid daily on my back, a load so heavy that only humility can carry it, and the backs of the proud will be broken." God has been breaking me. He has been humbling me, showing me that I need to rely on Him. Does that mean I leave a job for the uncertainty of scrounging together funding for the church? I don't know. I share my dichotomy of glory with you so that you have the opportunity to carry the weight of my glory- from the good or the bad- just as I have had the blessing of bearing the weight of glory of Wally and Crissy and Jay and Amanda.
It has made me see Christ more clearly this late Fall day. His glory is what matters, let us seek it together whether we find in life or death, duty or passion.
How glory can be found in two opposite things, at the same time.
How God can be lifted up by polarized events.
Life and Death
Yesterday, I went to the hospital to visit my friends (and co-Gate leaders) Wally and Crissy. They had just become proud parents of a sleepy (for the moment) baby boy named Liam. I walked into a room filled with family and friends of the new Mom and Dad, and gazed into their smiling, beaming faces as I shook hands and introduced myself. Then, in the faces of Wally and Crissy, I saw another dichotomy- a strange but familiar mixture of excitement and exhaustion. Every hospital room I've ever entered with the intent of congratulating new parents has held the same expression my friends held. After a long sleepless and uncomfortable night, a new joy was here. As much as they said they were exhausted and couldn't wait to sleep, I knew they would just as soon spend the next week gazing at this little miracle they could call their own.
I walked into my home, just a few minutes later, and saw Kristin sitting at the computer, tears in her eyes. Before I could tell here about what I had just seen, she informed me that another couple that we are friends with, Jay and Amanda, had just lost their baby. Jay and Amanda are also friends with Wally and Crissy, so the fact that two groups of people we know would experience the opposite ends of a similar event on the same day left us questioning: How could this be?
On one hand, God has been glorified by the miracle of birth and thankfulness of one family, but He has also been glorified by the tragedy of another. Over the last day, Amanda and Jay have been an amazing example of faith and trust in a sometimes incomprehensible God. They have turned to Him, they have trusted in Him. They have glorified Him.
No, it doesn't make sense. I rejoice with Wally and Crissy. But I grieve with Jay and Amanda. With both, we must trust God. I think another of our friends, Michelle, said it best: "Celebrating today with a dear friend for the birth of her son. Mourning today with a dear friend for the loss of her son. Two friends. Same God. I have no words."
It is at times like this where we don't know what to say. Often, I simply want to say, "I have nothing to offer but my prayers and my God. May they be sufficient."
Duty and Passion
I have a real job. It's purpose is to pay the bills to enable us to lead our church. It is not my passion, nor even an interest of mine. It is a gift of God and came just when we needed it. Over the last three years, I have built relationships, and I have done my duty. Occasionally I've done a real good job. I don't wake up excited to go to work, but I try to do the best I can at it. When I succeed at this and at sharing my life and love for Christ with my co-workers, God is glorified.
For the past month or so, I have been meeting with some guys. Four different guys, four different types of conversations, four very uplifting times for me. Because I see God working in their lives, I am being challenged in my faith. My vision for serving Christ through the Gate has awakened. My passion for His calling on my life has burned brighter, and more intense than it has since we first set out to begin this journey three years ago. I have desire to write, and want to do it more and more. I want to publish a book I've written. I want to meet more people. I want to work hard at making the Gate an entity that points to God by reaching those farthest from Him. My passion is awakened, this glorifies God.
I am now torn between glorifying God by doing a good job at my "real job" and glorifying God by pursuing the passion He sent me here for. The problem is that neither is happening the best they can because I am divided. Can I do both? I've been good at doing one real well to the detriment of the other, or doing both in a mediocre way. That doesn't glorify God.
Safety or Jump
So here I am. Torn. God can be glorified by life or death. God can be glorified by duty or passion. For me, the question is, can I glorify God by staying in the safe place, with my job, or do I have to take a leap of faith? I know of a lot of people who can balance the bi-vocational life, but can I?
The last time I took a leap of faith, a real jump, was when we moved to College Station to start the Gate. We left the safety of an established ministry for the uncertainty of a brand new bar church for college students. It has been the toughest thing I have ever done, but in many ways, through numerous relationships, I believe it may have brought more glory to God than anything else I have ever done.
I think about the glory I saw on display yesterday. The glory of a newborn child and the glory of a grieving family enveloped in the arms of Christ. I shared with them their glory: smiles for the new baby and tears for the one lost.
As C. S. Lewis said, "The load, or weight, or burden, of my neighbour's glory should be laid daily on my back, a load so heavy that only humility can carry it, and the backs of the proud will be broken." God has been breaking me. He has been humbling me, showing me that I need to rely on Him. Does that mean I leave a job for the uncertainty of scrounging together funding for the church? I don't know. I share my dichotomy of glory with you so that you have the opportunity to carry the weight of my glory- from the good or the bad- just as I have had the blessing of bearing the weight of glory of Wally and Crissy and Jay and Amanda.
It has made me see Christ more clearly this late Fall day. His glory is what matters, let us seek it together whether we find in life or death, duty or passion.
Monday, October 25, 2010
Why Scripture?
If "Why do you believe in God?" is the first key question we should ask, "Why do you believe the Bible to be true?" needs to come next.
I definitely think that this is the question that stumps most of us. See, we can defend our belief in God and even Jesus with our experiences, but we have tough time with the Scriptures. I know I do. The truth is, I believe the Bible to be true because I was raised with it.
While that may sound good enough to a lot of you, it simply is not good enough for many others.
I asked myself that question just yesterday. Suddenly, I realized my belief in the Bible as the Word of God- as opposed to the Koran or the Hindu Vedas- was based primarily on the fact that it was what I was exposed to. The question that followed was, "If I had been raised in an Islamic country and believed in God, would I not then find myself accepting the Koran as the Word of God?" The idea that we ally ourselves with the faith of the culture we are born into is a very close relative to the thought that we ally ourselves with the most readily available Sacred Text.
I confess I have not done an exhaustive study of any other Sacred Text, aside from the Bible. I have read passages and attempted to discover the context of quotes I see from time to time, but I have never even read one chapter of the Koran in its entirety. I have read a chapter or two of the Book of Mormon, and actually possess a copy at my home, so I'm doing slightly better there.
So, then, why can I truthfully say I believe the Bible to be true and these other books false, when I have not read them?
Ouch.
It does not matter that I fully trust and believe Jesus to my Savior, that God is One, that the Bible is the inspired Word of God. Well, it doesn't matter to anyone but me.
That being said,I don't believe it necessary to have studied all world religions before deciding on the right one. If you believe in God, and you believe He speaks to us and guides us the truth then you CAN believe that the first book you pick up is the right one. Or you may go through many before feeling God point you to the Bible as His Word.
I don't have to read everything, to know the One thing.
But we also do not have the license to immediately dismiss that which we have no knowledge of.
Paul saw truth in the polytheistic religion of the Athenians, when he praised them for their faith in Acts 17. Throughout history, the church has 'borrowed' practices from pagan and other cultures, then transformed them to be in the image of Christ.
There are good teachings in all religions. There are good practices,even if we don't accept their vision of God. I can't say enough about how much I respect the Mormon church's teaching on the community of believers, even if I don't agree with what I have read and spoken to Mormon's about in regards to much of their doctrine. I wish we were as great at it as they are.
I guess what I'm trying to convey is: you need to seek whatever assurance you need to believe that the Bible is truth. I accept it on faith, and you to will come to a point where you will also have to accept OR reject it based on faith. You may spend years investigating (and truthfully, we must seek answers constantly in regards to why we believe what we believe about the Bible), or you simply decide. You need to learn to read it for what it is, not what you think it is- read it within the historical context, not within your biased view. ( We all have a biased view, and we all occasionally read into Scripture what we want it to say, but we must limit this as much as possible.) God's Word is living, so let it speak. Ask God to give you wisdom to understand, to see, to accept.
One more thing- be respectful of other Sacred Texts. They are loved and trusted by millions, as much or more than we love and trust our Bible. To simply shut down conversation with them because you don't agree is wrong. So is continuing the conversation just to argue. If you want them to listen to what your Sacred Text has to say, you better be willing to listen to theirs. You will not win a person by putting down their beliefs or their doctrine as idiotic, stupid or evil. There will come a time to take a stand and say that you don't agree with them, but even that can and must be done in love and compassion.
The Bible itself is a sword, sharp and cutting. Your tongue and attitude is not needed to pierce their heart.
I definitely think that this is the question that stumps most of us. See, we can defend our belief in God and even Jesus with our experiences, but we have tough time with the Scriptures. I know I do. The truth is, I believe the Bible to be true because I was raised with it.
While that may sound good enough to a lot of you, it simply is not good enough for many others.
I asked myself that question just yesterday. Suddenly, I realized my belief in the Bible as the Word of God- as opposed to the Koran or the Hindu Vedas- was based primarily on the fact that it was what I was exposed to. The question that followed was, "If I had been raised in an Islamic country and believed in God, would I not then find myself accepting the Koran as the Word of God?" The idea that we ally ourselves with the faith of the culture we are born into is a very close relative to the thought that we ally ourselves with the most readily available Sacred Text.
I confess I have not done an exhaustive study of any other Sacred Text, aside from the Bible. I have read passages and attempted to discover the context of quotes I see from time to time, but I have never even read one chapter of the Koran in its entirety. I have read a chapter or two of the Book of Mormon, and actually possess a copy at my home, so I'm doing slightly better there.
So, then, why can I truthfully say I believe the Bible to be true and these other books false, when I have not read them?
Ouch.
It does not matter that I fully trust and believe Jesus to my Savior, that God is One, that the Bible is the inspired Word of God. Well, it doesn't matter to anyone but me.
That being said,I don't believe it necessary to have studied all world religions before deciding on the right one. If you believe in God, and you believe He speaks to us and guides us the truth then you CAN believe that the first book you pick up is the right one. Or you may go through many before feeling God point you to the Bible as His Word.
I don't have to read everything, to know the One thing.
But we also do not have the license to immediately dismiss that which we have no knowledge of.
Paul saw truth in the polytheistic religion of the Athenians, when he praised them for their faith in Acts 17. Throughout history, the church has 'borrowed' practices from pagan and other cultures, then transformed them to be in the image of Christ.
There are good teachings in all religions. There are good practices,even if we don't accept their vision of God. I can't say enough about how much I respect the Mormon church's teaching on the community of believers, even if I don't agree with what I have read and spoken to Mormon's about in regards to much of their doctrine. I wish we were as great at it as they are.
I guess what I'm trying to convey is: you need to seek whatever assurance you need to believe that the Bible is truth. I accept it on faith, and you to will come to a point where you will also have to accept OR reject it based on faith. You may spend years investigating (and truthfully, we must seek answers constantly in regards to why we believe what we believe about the Bible), or you simply decide. You need to learn to read it for what it is, not what you think it is- read it within the historical context, not within your biased view. ( We all have a biased view, and we all occasionally read into Scripture what we want it to say, but we must limit this as much as possible.) God's Word is living, so let it speak. Ask God to give you wisdom to understand, to see, to accept.
One more thing- be respectful of other Sacred Texts. They are loved and trusted by millions, as much or more than we love and trust our Bible. To simply shut down conversation with them because you don't agree is wrong. So is continuing the conversation just to argue. If you want them to listen to what your Sacred Text has to say, you better be willing to listen to theirs. You will not win a person by putting down their beliefs or their doctrine as idiotic, stupid or evil. There will come a time to take a stand and say that you don't agree with them, but even that can and must be done in love and compassion.
The Bible itself is a sword, sharp and cutting. Your tongue and attitude is not needed to pierce their heart.
Thursday, October 21, 2010
From the outside looking in, you can't understand it; From the inside looking out, you can't explain it.
We are His portion and He is our prize,
Drawn to redemption by the grace in His eyes,
If His grace is an ocean, we're all sinking.
And Heaven meets earth like an unforeseen kiss,
And my heart turns violently inside of my chest,
I don't have time to maintain these regrets,
When I think about, the way
Oh! how He loves us,
Oh! how He loves.
How He Loves ( David Crowder Version)
I'm starting to take at least one day a week to listen to worship music on the drive to work. Normally, I try to pray, but I often fall into the rut of just talking to God and not listening. There is nothing wrong with sharing our heart with God, asking Him, thanking Him, sharing our problems. But like any relationship, we need it to not be one sided.
Lately, How He Loves by The David Crowder*Band has been the song that speaks to me. Really, since it came out it has profoundly affected me. When John Mark McMillan wrote it, it was written about a man who stated if he could, by dying, shake the youth of the world for Christ, so be it. And that day he was killed in car accident. Its a song about the unseen world of God touching ours. No, make that invading ours.
The excerpt I posted above is no doubt my favorite part. It speaks the answer to the question of "Why do I believe in God?" That answer is simple- I believe because I have been caught up in Him. I have been hypnotized by Christ through His grace and His love. He has blessed me unexpectedly ( the unforeseen/sloppy wet kiss line). He has caused me to be in conflict with myself, my heart does turn violently inside my chest each time I come to a decision point of choosing my way or God's.
The funny thing about these experiences of God that I've had is that they are not verifiable, at least, not scientifically so. I did not come to believe in grace because someone showed me a diagram of how it works- I believe it because I have relief when I confess my sins and because I have seen grace shown from a follower of Christ to another human being. Regardless of the differences between them. I do not believe in God's love because He sent me roses, I believe because I have known a comfort that comes as if from nowhere and everywhere at the same time. I do not believe in God's power because I can look at an inventory of His armory, but because I have seen examples of His power demonstrated in storms and fires and mountains and oceans- and in the power of His people that are able to endure.
Here at A&M there is a saying, "From the outside looking in, you can't understand it; From the inside looking out, you can't explain it." It may sound dismissive, but I think that believing in God can be the same. God doesn't make sense, He doesn't translate well to a person who doesn't know faith in Him. This is not an excuse for us to be elitist or uppity about us having a 'special knowledge.' In fact, there is no special knowledge at all, just a different relationship gained by engaging God. That is really what the Aggie quote is all about. If you want to understand the Aggie Spirit, you have to experience it by engaging it. No amount of explanation or charts or logic will truly make it clear to you. You have to be immersed in it.
If you want to understand God, you have to let the grace in His eyes draw you to redemption. You have to allow your defenses to drop, to let your guard down, to be caught up in Him. Sink in the ocean of grace to understand that He loves you so much that nothing you've done or could ever do is too much for Him to wash away. You will be so lost in the abundance of God, that any regrets you have held onto- for past mistakes or indulgences, or for failures- could not be held onto.
If you want to get to know another person, looking up their vital stats, their facts and figures won't help you. (Unless its for fantasy football, then, maybe.) Sitting down with them, allowing their conversation to wash over you, learning the way they talk, the little quirks of their personality, this is how you know them.
So when I sit in the car, letting the words of the song wash over me, letting the voice of God speak to me as He would like, then I come to know Him, and why I believe in Him.
Drawn to redemption by the grace in His eyes,
If His grace is an ocean, we're all sinking.
And Heaven meets earth like an unforeseen kiss,
And my heart turns violently inside of my chest,
I don't have time to maintain these regrets,
When I think about, the way
Oh! how He loves us,
Oh! how He loves.
How He Loves ( David Crowder Version)
I'm starting to take at least one day a week to listen to worship music on the drive to work. Normally, I try to pray, but I often fall into the rut of just talking to God and not listening. There is nothing wrong with sharing our heart with God, asking Him, thanking Him, sharing our problems. But like any relationship, we need it to not be one sided.
Lately, How He Loves by The David Crowder*Band has been the song that speaks to me. Really, since it came out it has profoundly affected me. When John Mark McMillan wrote it, it was written about a man who stated if he could, by dying, shake the youth of the world for Christ, so be it. And that day he was killed in car accident. Its a song about the unseen world of God touching ours. No, make that invading ours.
The excerpt I posted above is no doubt my favorite part. It speaks the answer to the question of "Why do I believe in God?" That answer is simple- I believe because I have been caught up in Him. I have been hypnotized by Christ through His grace and His love. He has blessed me unexpectedly ( the unforeseen/sloppy wet kiss line). He has caused me to be in conflict with myself, my heart does turn violently inside my chest each time I come to a decision point of choosing my way or God's.
The funny thing about these experiences of God that I've had is that they are not verifiable, at least, not scientifically so. I did not come to believe in grace because someone showed me a diagram of how it works- I believe it because I have relief when I confess my sins and because I have seen grace shown from a follower of Christ to another human being. Regardless of the differences between them. I do not believe in God's love because He sent me roses, I believe because I have known a comfort that comes as if from nowhere and everywhere at the same time. I do not believe in God's power because I can look at an inventory of His armory, but because I have seen examples of His power demonstrated in storms and fires and mountains and oceans- and in the power of His people that are able to endure.
Here at A&M there is a saying, "From the outside looking in, you can't understand it; From the inside looking out, you can't explain it." It may sound dismissive, but I think that believing in God can be the same. God doesn't make sense, He doesn't translate well to a person who doesn't know faith in Him. This is not an excuse for us to be elitist or uppity about us having a 'special knowledge.' In fact, there is no special knowledge at all, just a different relationship gained by engaging God. That is really what the Aggie quote is all about. If you want to understand the Aggie Spirit, you have to experience it by engaging it. No amount of explanation or charts or logic will truly make it clear to you. You have to be immersed in it.
If you want to understand God, you have to let the grace in His eyes draw you to redemption. You have to allow your defenses to drop, to let your guard down, to be caught up in Him. Sink in the ocean of grace to understand that He loves you so much that nothing you've done or could ever do is too much for Him to wash away. You will be so lost in the abundance of God, that any regrets you have held onto- for past mistakes or indulgences, or for failures- could not be held onto.
If you want to get to know another person, looking up their vital stats, their facts and figures won't help you. (Unless its for fantasy football, then, maybe.) Sitting down with them, allowing their conversation to wash over you, learning the way they talk, the little quirks of their personality, this is how you know them.
So when I sit in the car, letting the words of the song wash over me, letting the voice of God speak to me as He would like, then I come to know Him, and why I believe in Him.
Monday, October 18, 2010
Why God?
Warning: How you read the title of this post says a lot about where you might be spiritually.
If you read it with an implied comma between the two words, you are questioning something that is happening to you. If you read it without an implied comma, you are questioning God- His existence/character/relevance/etc. Both readings are really about the same thing:
Belief.
America, by and large, believes in God. In general, it is the Judeo-Christian God, if the numerous studies from groups like the Barna Institute are to be accepted. Most of these studies have somewhere in the neighborhood of 85% of Americans calling themselves Christians. It is almost as though we just accept that God is real because it is a part of our cultural identity. We are American therefore we are Christian, therefore we believe in God. If asked why we believe in God, we give an answer that belies this belief- "I was raised to believe in God."
This is not a response that is invalid- but it is a response that lacks maturity of belief. I would argue that most of these people who say they believe in God believe it in much the same way they were raised to believe in Santa Claus. The only difference is that at some point it becomes culturally unacceptable to believe in Santa. If there were more social repurcussions for believing in God, I bet fewer people would claim Him.
Why?
I believe it is because we fail to ask "Why(,) God?" I would bet that many of the 15% who do not call themselves Christian have asked this question, and thier answer was one in which God was not needed- or at least the Judeo-Christian God was not needed. Maybe we fear asking "Why God?" because we fear the answer is that God is like Santa Claus, and we remember the pain of that truth coming home to our heart. To learn that God is not real would be too much for us, and rather than ask hard questions, we choose to remain blissfully ignorant. Or maybe we never question "Why God?" because we are supposed to have faith and trust God. Even Jesus said, "Don't put God to the test." (Luke 4:12)
My answer to this: God can take it.
I believe God is real- He is no Santa Claus. And I believe we need to test our faith, we must determine if WE believe God is real. Faith is not always about blind submission (though there are times when we need to just take a leap of faith). We need not test God like Satan was tempting Jesus to do- "God, if you're real, do something for my benefit and my glory." But we do need to test our belief.
We do this by experience. We seek answers- from friends, family, science, religion, scripture- most importantly we need to seek answers from what we encounter. I believe God is real because of what I see of Him in nature and in the lives of those around me. I believe in God because of what I have read about Him. I believe in God because of those times when I have experienced something that has no other explanation but God.
I believe in God because of the answers I've gotten when I asked, "Why, God?"
When my father died, I asked "Why,God?" and was answered with His comfort. When the ministry has seemed fruitless, I've asked "Why, God?" and been answered with a lesson in patience. When attacked, I've asked "Why, God?" and been answered with deliverance by various means. When good has come, I've asked "Why, God?" and been answered with peace.
I've asked "Why God?" and I've asked "Why, God?" I haven't always liked the answer, or the timing of the answer, but each one has served to deepen and mature my belief. I have feared asking the question, but to be honest with myself and with God, I must ask it. We all must ask it.
So when you ask me, "Why God?" I will respond that I choose to believe in God because I have experienced Him. I have encountered Him. And following those answers in my life there has come validation from others, from Scripture, and from doctrine.
But first and foremost, I believe in God because He has believed in me enough to reveal Himself.
And He believes in you.
If you read it with an implied comma between the two words, you are questioning something that is happening to you. If you read it without an implied comma, you are questioning God- His existence/character/relevance/etc. Both readings are really about the same thing:
Belief.
America, by and large, believes in God. In general, it is the Judeo-Christian God, if the numerous studies from groups like the Barna Institute are to be accepted. Most of these studies have somewhere in the neighborhood of 85% of Americans calling themselves Christians. It is almost as though we just accept that God is real because it is a part of our cultural identity. We are American therefore we are Christian, therefore we believe in God. If asked why we believe in God, we give an answer that belies this belief- "I was raised to believe in God."
This is not a response that is invalid- but it is a response that lacks maturity of belief. I would argue that most of these people who say they believe in God believe it in much the same way they were raised to believe in Santa Claus. The only difference is that at some point it becomes culturally unacceptable to believe in Santa. If there were more social repurcussions for believing in God, I bet fewer people would claim Him.
Why?
I believe it is because we fail to ask "Why(,) God?" I would bet that many of the 15% who do not call themselves Christian have asked this question, and thier answer was one in which God was not needed- or at least the Judeo-Christian God was not needed. Maybe we fear asking "Why God?" because we fear the answer is that God is like Santa Claus, and we remember the pain of that truth coming home to our heart. To learn that God is not real would be too much for us, and rather than ask hard questions, we choose to remain blissfully ignorant. Or maybe we never question "Why God?" because we are supposed to have faith and trust God. Even Jesus said, "Don't put God to the test." (Luke 4:12)
My answer to this: God can take it.
I believe God is real- He is no Santa Claus. And I believe we need to test our faith, we must determine if WE believe God is real. Faith is not always about blind submission (though there are times when we need to just take a leap of faith). We need not test God like Satan was tempting Jesus to do- "God, if you're real, do something for my benefit and my glory." But we do need to test our belief.
We do this by experience. We seek answers- from friends, family, science, religion, scripture- most importantly we need to seek answers from what we encounter. I believe God is real because of what I see of Him in nature and in the lives of those around me. I believe in God because of what I have read about Him. I believe in God because of those times when I have experienced something that has no other explanation but God.
I believe in God because of the answers I've gotten when I asked, "Why, God?"
When my father died, I asked "Why,God?" and was answered with His comfort. When the ministry has seemed fruitless, I've asked "Why, God?" and been answered with a lesson in patience. When attacked, I've asked "Why, God?" and been answered with deliverance by various means. When good has come, I've asked "Why, God?" and been answered with peace.
I've asked "Why God?" and I've asked "Why, God?" I haven't always liked the answer, or the timing of the answer, but each one has served to deepen and mature my belief. I have feared asking the question, but to be honest with myself and with God, I must ask it. We all must ask it.
So when you ask me, "Why God?" I will respond that I choose to believe in God because I have experienced Him. I have encountered Him. And following those answers in my life there has come validation from others, from Scripture, and from doctrine.
But first and foremost, I believe in God because He has believed in me enough to reveal Himself.
And He believes in you.
Thursday, October 14, 2010
Broken or Crushed
Jesus said to them, "Have you never read in the Scriptures:
" 'The stone the builders rejected
has become the capstone;
the Lord has done this,
and it is marvelous in our eyes'?
"Therefore I tell you that the kingdom of God will be taken away from you and given to a people who will produce its fruit. He who falls on this stone will be broken to pieces, but he on whom it falls will be crushed."
-Matthew 21:42-44
Every time I see this verse used, it is used to illustrate how the supposed 'chosen' miss their opportunity to see the Messiah, so the rejected by the elite become the new Chosen. It is a cautionary tale to all of us who think we have it made that we can miss the key to it all. The Pharisees had all the knowledge, all the lineage, all the history to see the Messiah, but they missed it. They rejected Him and so missed out on the kingdom of God.
But there is something else here. Something subtle, something under the radar that I've rarely seen expounded upon. Maybe it is because it is a difficult thought, or maybe it is because it is not a 'safe' idea.
You don't encounter Jesus and survive.
Jesus says there are those who fall on this rejected capstone, and there are those on whom the capstone falls. One is broken, one is crushed. Both are destroyed.
Falling on the Stone
I take this to apply to those who come to Jesus. These people come to him, and fall on him, they trust in him and willingly worship him. It makes sense to me that the imagery Jesus uses here is one of being broken, like a pot that falls to the floor. We often talk about Jesus 'breaking our hearts' for something: a people, a sin, a tragedy. The idea of worship is about being broken. It is about realizing our failure to measure up- our pride being broken- and accepting the gift of God that makes us worthy. Worship is seeing less of me, and more of Jesus.
The thing about being broken is that we can't be put back together. We're Humpty Dumpty, broken before our king, only our king CAN rebuild us. To be broken is to be at ground zero, the starting point. What is then made from our ruin is the work of of Christ as he comes to dwell in us. TO be broken is to cease fighting against his will.
Crushed by the Stone
Other folks are found by God. They are not looking for Him, or in the case of these Pharisees, they are outright opposing Him. They push Him away, reject Him, but the power of Christ is overwhelming. He crushes us. The truth is that everyone will someday worship Christ. Every. Single. One. The only difference is if you will worship Him in His presence, or worship Him as you are separated from Him. Will you worship Him as your Savior, or as the Holy One you have realized too late?
You Can't Live
The truth is, you can't live with or without Jesus.
To know him is to give your life to him, and for him. This idea that we can't live with Jesus is not so much about us dying as it is about us letting HIM live in us. Letting our own fears and failures, our own flaws and our own prejudices die so that HE can be the guiding, driving force of our lives. Our ambitions must fall. Our plans must fail. Our vision must go dark. All in the life of Christ. If we do anything 'for Jesus' that is really for us, it is as good as dead.
No, we must live- not our lives- we must live His life, the one He marks out for us, the one He gives to us.
Let us be broken of our selves, so that He may repair us in His image.
" 'The stone the builders rejected
has become the capstone;
the Lord has done this,
and it is marvelous in our eyes'?
"Therefore I tell you that the kingdom of God will be taken away from you and given to a people who will produce its fruit. He who falls on this stone will be broken to pieces, but he on whom it falls will be crushed."
-Matthew 21:42-44
Every time I see this verse used, it is used to illustrate how the supposed 'chosen' miss their opportunity to see the Messiah, so the rejected by the elite become the new Chosen. It is a cautionary tale to all of us who think we have it made that we can miss the key to it all. The Pharisees had all the knowledge, all the lineage, all the history to see the Messiah, but they missed it. They rejected Him and so missed out on the kingdom of God.
But there is something else here. Something subtle, something under the radar that I've rarely seen expounded upon. Maybe it is because it is a difficult thought, or maybe it is because it is not a 'safe' idea.
You don't encounter Jesus and survive.
Jesus says there are those who fall on this rejected capstone, and there are those on whom the capstone falls. One is broken, one is crushed. Both are destroyed.
Falling on the Stone
I take this to apply to those who come to Jesus. These people come to him, and fall on him, they trust in him and willingly worship him. It makes sense to me that the imagery Jesus uses here is one of being broken, like a pot that falls to the floor. We often talk about Jesus 'breaking our hearts' for something: a people, a sin, a tragedy. The idea of worship is about being broken. It is about realizing our failure to measure up- our pride being broken- and accepting the gift of God that makes us worthy. Worship is seeing less of me, and more of Jesus.
The thing about being broken is that we can't be put back together. We're Humpty Dumpty, broken before our king, only our king CAN rebuild us. To be broken is to be at ground zero, the starting point. What is then made from our ruin is the work of of Christ as he comes to dwell in us. TO be broken is to cease fighting against his will.
Crushed by the Stone
Other folks are found by God. They are not looking for Him, or in the case of these Pharisees, they are outright opposing Him. They push Him away, reject Him, but the power of Christ is overwhelming. He crushes us. The truth is that everyone will someday worship Christ. Every. Single. One. The only difference is if you will worship Him in His presence, or worship Him as you are separated from Him. Will you worship Him as your Savior, or as the Holy One you have realized too late?
You Can't Live
The truth is, you can't live with or without Jesus.
To know him is to give your life to him, and for him. This idea that we can't live with Jesus is not so much about us dying as it is about us letting HIM live in us. Letting our own fears and failures, our own flaws and our own prejudices die so that HE can be the guiding, driving force of our lives. Our ambitions must fall. Our plans must fail. Our vision must go dark. All in the life of Christ. If we do anything 'for Jesus' that is really for us, it is as good as dead.
No, we must live- not our lives- we must live His life, the one He marks out for us, the one He gives to us.
Let us be broken of our selves, so that He may repair us in His image.
Tuesday, October 12, 2010
Doesn't Put Forth Best Effort
Yesterday, Kristin and I went to our first ever Parent/Teacher Conference. We sat and talked with the teacher about Leslie's school performance, about how we thought she was doing well, and about where she was expected to be. We got our first look at a report card, and on the back were the 'grades' for the first six weeks. It was a series of phrases, like "Respectful to others" and "Follows Directions" and stuff. We smiled, noticing that each one had a "Y" beside it, indicating that, yes, she did that. Well, each one but one. Beside the box for "Puts forth best effort," was a big fat N. Apparently, N means "Needs improvement," but to me, N means, "No she doesn't." It turns out that Leslie always turns her stuff in done, and done right, but not necessarily done to the best of her ability. She has a good deal of natural ability to do what is asked, and she coasts on that.
It was like looking in a mirror.
I was an A student all through school, and never had to study. I hit college, discovered that to stay an A student I had to study- but I could get B's and C's by coasting. If there is a short-cut to doing something, I will find it. I might go so far as to say that I am lazy, but prefer to think of myself as sub-optimally efficient.
I think we all have something, or several somethings, that we fail to put our best effort into. We focus on the end, and not the journey to the end. We want to finish, and quickly. It may be the nature of our lives these days: hectic, busy, and full. Maybe we have taken on too much, or maybe we have taken on the wrong things. The truth is, our lives seem destined for mediocrity.
Don't get me wrong, I know quite a few of the people I spend time with work very, very hard to do well at their classes and their jobs. They spend late nights and lots of money on caffeinated beverages. They are consumed with thoughts of deadlines and performance reviews and tests and comprehension. They are struggling to balance this part of their life with the relationships that make living worth it. They are struggling to give to their friends, families and God the time they deserve.
This begs the question: Are we putting out our best effort where we need to?
I am absolutely not advocating that students not study, and employees not work. But I am wondering if we are putting as much effort into our time with the ones we love as we are our textbooks? Are giving the same attention to God as we are our In Box?
How often have I run through a routine prayer, or glanced through a short chapter because I had important things to do? I know I've struggled to listen to the thoughts of my friends and family when I know that I have something else pending. The simple truth is, if we are not putting forth our best effort with our families and especially with God, it doesn't matter what grades we make or how prestigious our job is. Those we claim to love deserve our best.
Our prayers need to be more than skin deep, they need to come from a deep place, a heart place. We need to pray as if it matters- because it does. We need to realize that our prayers, even the least of them, are heard by God. We need to understand and believe that when we pray, things happen. Sick are healed, prisoners are freed, mountains are moved. And we need to give our attention to God's Word. Let it pierce us, let it burn our hearts. We need to listen to Him and heed His nudges.
Our faith has taken a mediocre tint of late. It seems rare to see someone really on fire, really passionate about Jesus. I can't help but think it is because we have let our attentions wander, and our affections have followed. While it is true we are under grace, as James tells us, our faith without works is dead. That goes for our pursuit of God.
We may know tons of scripture, we may sing the most beautiful praise songs, we can even give of our time and possesions to the poor. But all of these are poor efforts if we do not first put our BEST effort into knowing Him. Personally.
So, what about you? Do you give God the same attention, the same effort that you do getting that A, or earning that promotion, or even winning that guy/girl?
I know that I don't. But, the first step to putting forth our best effort in pursuit of God is realizing that we "Need Some Improvement," then acting on it.
It was like looking in a mirror.
I was an A student all through school, and never had to study. I hit college, discovered that to stay an A student I had to study- but I could get B's and C's by coasting. If there is a short-cut to doing something, I will find it. I might go so far as to say that I am lazy, but prefer to think of myself as sub-optimally efficient.
I think we all have something, or several somethings, that we fail to put our best effort into. We focus on the end, and not the journey to the end. We want to finish, and quickly. It may be the nature of our lives these days: hectic, busy, and full. Maybe we have taken on too much, or maybe we have taken on the wrong things. The truth is, our lives seem destined for mediocrity.
Don't get me wrong, I know quite a few of the people I spend time with work very, very hard to do well at their classes and their jobs. They spend late nights and lots of money on caffeinated beverages. They are consumed with thoughts of deadlines and performance reviews and tests and comprehension. They are struggling to balance this part of their life with the relationships that make living worth it. They are struggling to give to their friends, families and God the time they deserve.
This begs the question: Are we putting out our best effort where we need to?
I am absolutely not advocating that students not study, and employees not work. But I am wondering if we are putting as much effort into our time with the ones we love as we are our textbooks? Are giving the same attention to God as we are our In Box?
How often have I run through a routine prayer, or glanced through a short chapter because I had important things to do? I know I've struggled to listen to the thoughts of my friends and family when I know that I have something else pending. The simple truth is, if we are not putting forth our best effort with our families and especially with God, it doesn't matter what grades we make or how prestigious our job is. Those we claim to love deserve our best.
Our prayers need to be more than skin deep, they need to come from a deep place, a heart place. We need to pray as if it matters- because it does. We need to realize that our prayers, even the least of them, are heard by God. We need to understand and believe that when we pray, things happen. Sick are healed, prisoners are freed, mountains are moved. And we need to give our attention to God's Word. Let it pierce us, let it burn our hearts. We need to listen to Him and heed His nudges.
Our faith has taken a mediocre tint of late. It seems rare to see someone really on fire, really passionate about Jesus. I can't help but think it is because we have let our attentions wander, and our affections have followed. While it is true we are under grace, as James tells us, our faith without works is dead. That goes for our pursuit of God.
We may know tons of scripture, we may sing the most beautiful praise songs, we can even give of our time and possesions to the poor. But all of these are poor efforts if we do not first put our BEST effort into knowing Him. Personally.
So, what about you? Do you give God the same attention, the same effort that you do getting that A, or earning that promotion, or even winning that guy/girl?
I know that I don't. But, the first step to putting forth our best effort in pursuit of God is realizing that we "Need Some Improvement," then acting on it.
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