I Don't Hate You

I don't hate you because you are gay. I have a set of beliefs, founded in my faith and based on scriptures, and these beliefs are that I am a new creation in Christ. It is my identity. In my identity, I follow the commands of my God out of love for Him. He says that homosexuality is a sin, and as so with all of His words, I try to heed that. That means that at the same time I see homosexuality as a sin, I also see no cause for me to judge you. All I can say is what I believe, and then I must strive to treat you as Christ would- not with hate, but with love and a desire to understand where you are.

I don't hate you because you are of a different faith. I respect your devotion to your faith, and would hope you could respect mine. In fact, I believe devoted people of all faiths can teach each other how to be better people- Mormons understand community and charity better than most, Muslims are more committed than most, Buddhists are far less materialistic. The issue for us all is that we believe very strongly that our way is the true way, and in many cases our belief system states that it is the only way. So, until one day when all Truth is revealed, you will continue to share your message with me, and I with you. I will do all I can to be courteous and thoughtful in our discussion, but I understand we may never agree. Ultimately, your decisions (and mine) regarding faith are between you and your deity.

I don't hate you because you are a murderer/terrorist/criminal. You've done bad things. You've hurt people. I do not condone, agree with, or understand your actions. But I cannot hate you, because I am guilty of murder as well. I may not have pulled a trigger, detonated a bomb, or stabbed anyone, but my actions led to the death of someone. My sin created a need for an atoning sacrifice-I had to pay for my sins with my eternal life being separated from God. But someone could step in and take my punishment. Jesus was the only one worthy of making that sacrifice, and He did it, willingly, on a cross. To save me from my sin, He put Himself there. My sins, they killed Him. You and I, we are the same then. We have taken a life, we have done harm. And if there is grace for me, then there is grace for you. If God will show it to you, then I too will offer you grace, and hope for a true change in you.

I don't hate you for your politics. I'll be really honest, politics are cruel. They are almost like the new religion in America. Each side tries to paint the other as a tyrant and evil to core with a hidden agenda for world domination. Maybe it's true. But that doesn't matter. Even if one side has nefarious purposes, I shouldn't hate you. I can disagree, I can even fight aggressively against you, but I can never hate you. It's not always easy, mind you. Sometimes the things said are harsh and cruel and painful. The actions sometimes cut and sometimes attack the values I hold dear. But I must remind myself that the attacks on Jesus, and the quite literal cuts on His Body were far worse. And He offered not words of condemnation, but words of forgiveness. A lesson I try daily to put into practice.

I don't hate you because you're a jerk. You are mean, cruel, uncaring, selfish, and obtuse. I do not like being around you. You, you are the hardest to love. You are hardest to love because you are not distant, not a far-off concept- you are a neighbor, a boss, a co-worker, a roommate, a competitor. I know you personally, I see your face, and I hear your words as they are said- not as they typed in a story or recorded on TV. I see your faults, and I see your intentions perhaps more clearly than any other entity I disagree with. The truth is, I want to hate you. I want to see you fail, to see you caught in your transgressions. The wrongs you commit against me are not concepts and ideas, they are real and they affect my life directly. But I cannot hate you. Because, if not for circumstances being what they are, I could be you. In fact, there is probably someone out there who thinks of me as I think of you. I would hope that those people would confront me, and kindly, gently, enlighten me. I wish that you would allow me that. For as much as I want to hate you, I want to love you. Because love is better. It produces better things, good and productive things. Hate produces nothing but destruction. Cruel things were said and done to Jesus- and He loved even when we were unlovable.

This is the standard I am striving towards daily.

Slow Waker

I've noticed I take a long time to wake up.

In High School, I'd roll out of bed, sit on the couch, then lay on the couch, take a bit of breakfast, doze, repeat for a while, then slowly get ready. The process lasted about an hour.

Now that I'm an adult, it's much the same. Except, no breakfast and I hit the snooze for an hour, then turn on the TV and watch the morning news for a bit before getting ready.

I've also noticed there is a spiritual parallel with me.

The alarm goes off- warning me of a behavior or thought pattern that is not so healthy- and I acknowledge it, hit the snooze and go back to what I was doing. It's only when I finally catch a glimpse of just how bad - or how good the opportunity is, it goes both ways- that I finally begin to wake up. It's like when you see the clock and realize you've hit the snooze seven times, not five.

In my life, I have seasons of real spiritual growth, like most of us do. It is unfettered, unhindered and it is awesome. But there comes an end to that, for a myriad of reasons. Then enters the spiritual drought- the sleep- that in some ways serves to give rest from dogged pursuit of God's work. The sleep is not always a bad thing, if it is more of sabbatical and less of a hedonistic (in a bad way) vacation. Either way, you will need to wake up. God will call you to something or away from something as your alarm.

And if you are like me in my sleep and spiritual patterns, you will hit the snooze. And you will miss it.

There are practical ways to wake up fast from actual slumber- caffeine, cold stone floors, cold showers, true love's kiss. So, is there a practical way to wake from spiritual slumber?

I think there are several, but I have a 50-50 success rate at making/letting any of them work. So take me as I am.

1. Caffeine- If God is calling you to something, the best thing to jump headlong into it. Like good caffeine can jolt you awake, doing what God called you to do, made you to do- it can brighten you right up. Start drinking in the stuff God is giving you. Read the Bible passages that pertain to your perceived calling and pray for opportunities and guidance. Look for inspiration and ideas and opportunities everywhere. And go. Do it. The downside is that sometimes it is not easy to do- sometimes they are out of coffee. You have to jump through hoops to get to the calling, or you have to suffer through day jobs and struggles- wait for the pot of coffee to brew. This will require patience and diligence to not fall back asleep. But it will be worth it.

2. Cold Stone Floors- There is something about swinging your feet out of a warm, cozy bed and touching ice cold floors to tell you to watch your step. There are other variations of the 'cold stone floor,' generally involving something the pet did over night, or storms. They all serve the same purpose: a warning to wake up and watch out. Your path is dangerous. You should heed it- and if it's the pet accident variety, clean it up.

3. Cold Showers- If the cold floors didn't do it, then the shower will. Suddenly you wake to see your sin. It is stark, naked and right there. You cannot deny it and the damage the sinful sleep you've been in has done to you and others. You are motivated to get clean and do it fast- cold showers are unpleasant, but effective. But you must channel this repentant spirit into something (caffeine) or the remembrance of the unpleasant waking will fade and you will only remember the blissful ignorance of sleep.

4. True Love's Kiss- Sometimes all it takes to wake us from slumber is a gentle kiss from the one we love. It's the best way to wake up. When God offers you a gift, or a blessing, or a kindness, you open your eyes to see His love and grace staring at you. You are drawn out of the sleep and into His arms and worship is sprung forth. While the other methods require you to act, this one is the best because it is all about you just reacting to God. It's about His goodness and His grace.

Arise, shine, for your light has come, and the glory of the LORD rises upon you.

Isaiah 60:1

Jeremiah 29:11 is a Half Truth

Jeremiah 29:11 gets all the press.

Tell someone you're down about the way things are going with school or work or a relationship, and I'm pretty sure a Christian will begin their advice with "For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the LORD, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future."

It's a good verse- and I believe it has truth to it. Plus it looks good embroidered on a pillow and makes the advice giver seem somewhat enlightened. But there are two things that have always bugged me about it. One, the context is that Israel is being told they will get out of captivity and get to go home. Yes, this is a prophecy, but it is given specifically to the nation of Israel. But the greater context of the Bible does back up that part about God knowing the plans He has for us, so I'm good there. Honestly, this part doesn't bother me much.

But the second one does. Jeremiah 29:11 is truth- but it is only a part of the truth of this passage. When we read 29:11, we think God's benevolence is at work- and it is. We think God is just going to give us prosperity and good times- which is NOT the case. Disagree with me? Let's see what comes next in verses 12-14:

Then you will call on me and come and pray to me, and I will listen to you. You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart. I will be found by you,” declares the LORD, “and will bring you back from captivity. I will gather you from all the nations and places where I have banished you,” declares the LORD, “and will bring you back to the place from which I carried you into exile.”

See, the prosperity and lack of harm are, in fact, contingent on something. Several things actually. First, we must call on God, go to Him in prayer. No problem, you might say, you pray all the time, so you must be good. I pray a lot, too, but I don't always find prosperity or lack of harm in my life- how about you? Often, we pray BECAUSE of the problems in our lives. I know I often pray because I feel I need something, not because I want to chat with God. Perhaps that is why we often feel our prayers don't reach beyond the ceiling.

We are not, in fact, seeking God when we pray- we are seeking His blessing.

God essentially tells us that the good stuff is contingent upon the second thing- that we actually seek HIM, and with our whole heart. OK, easy enough to try to shift our focus from seeking God's stuff to seeking Him as a Person, but it's more than that. He asks for our whole heart to be in it.

Whole heart. Not half, not three-quarters, not 99.999999%. Whole. All of it.

I read of people griping that they can't see God, or hear/understand what He is saying in scripture, or that God just doesn't seem to be around anymore. I've heard people- believing Christians- say that. I've said that. And at the same time, I've known, deep down (for me at least, I can't speak for the others) that those moments come most often when my heart is, in fact, divided.

I can't find God when I'm looking for Him and fulfillment at work and ideas for the church and how to be a better husband and father. These are good things, important things, but if they are dividing my heart, they are going to block my view of God. I get that. But at the same time, just what is a "whole heart" and how do I get it?

Is God asking us to forsake all other people and things for Him?

Umm, yeah, He is.

He's not asking you to leave your family, quit your job and join a monastery, He's asking for your undivided heart- your undivided attention. Family, career, church- all of that can and should still be in your life, but instead of it being a portion of your life (read: heart) it should be a portion of your relationship to God. That's what I think He asking when He asks for our whole heart: That everything we do, we do for Him. Everything we think, pursue, say, attempt- all done with the mind of "How does this glorify God?"

I must confess this is a struggle I find growing increasingly difficult in my own life. I am often tempted to try to sort out things without asking that question first and often. I go to God with questions and requests for the purpose of my own prosperity and freedom from harm- not to just be with God. I often put church before God. I guess that makes me a Pharisee. I do good things and wait expectantly for blessings that never come. I ask God why, and He is probably responding with- "You did that for you, not for me."

So, back to Jeremiah 29:11- God tells Israel (and us) that He has no plans to bring us harm, but plenty to bring us prosperity. (An aside- I think this means a spiritual prosperity as much or more than any material prosperity.) What verse 12 tells us is that God has told us this hope, so that we would truly seek Him- then and only then will the plans God has for us come to fruition.

They are contingent upon God's grace, but like always with God's grace, it is contingent upon our acceptance of it. And we accept it by seeking God, looking for Him with all our attention AND affection.

Perhaps that is what "whole heart" is all about. All our attention and affection, given to God.

Sounds like good things are already pouring in with that attitude.

My Thoughts on Bin Laden

I really thought I'd react differently.

For almost ten years now, I've wanted Osama Bin Laden to be brought to justice. Like most Americans, I viewed him as an enemy, a threat to our lives and our philosophies. At times I'd go so far to say that I had a desire for his death to be particularly awful. He was responsible for the deaths of thousands- either by his own hand or by the commands he gave. He killed Christians, Jews, Muslims, Hindis, Atheists. He killed Americans, Europeans, Middle Easterners, Asians, Africans and countless other nationalities. He was as close to monster as a human can get. In many ways, he and Saddam Hussein were our generation's Hitler.

I am glad our soldiers and our government finally got him. In a way, I am glad he is dead. But as I watched the news conferences last night, and the video of Americans reacting, I was not overjoyed, I was not exuberant. I was sad. I was conflicted.

For the families of the victims of 9-11, and before that all the terrorist acts this man committed, I was happy. They got human justice- a violent man died violently. For our troops that have fought this war for nearly a decade, I was proud. For our nation that was seeking closure of a long gaping wound, I was satisfied.

But something was bothering me.

A man was dead. Though I don't know what his final spiritual condition was, unless there was a last gasp of repentance that we'll never know of, I feel pretty sure Bin Laden is in Hell. This is what was giving me pause at first. Then there were the jubilant celebrations by Americans. Then, a verse of Scripture surfaced in my mind.

“You have heard that it was said, ‘Love your neighbor and hate your enemy.’ But I tell you, love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you, that you may be children of your Father in heaven. He causes his sun to rise on the evil and the good, and sends rain on the righteous and the unrighteous." --Matthew 5:43-45

But for Grace, I'd be a Monster, Too
Over the years, my understanding of sin has changed. I've realized more and more my own depravity, my own penchant for doing terrible things. I've not mass murdered anyone, or stolen anything tangible, but I have done things that hurt others. Harsh words, painful actions, and stolen trust. I can be selfish and cruel. I am, by these deeds and more, worthy of Hell. But, I've met Jesus, and I've given my life to Him by accepting His Grace- His Sacrifice in my place. From what we know, Osama Bin Laden never did that. If he didn't, then he is in Hell for rejecting Christ- a rejection that I believe is the root of all the rest of his sinful (and ours as well) actions. A man, doer of evil that he was, is in Hell. A man created by God will suffer for eternity for his choices- and they were his CHOICES. I cannot gloat over this. I am no different from Bin Laden, from Hussein, from Hitler. My sins deserve the harshest punishment. But my choice to accept Christ rescued me from Hell. I did nothing to deserve this and everything to deserve Hell. So I cannot gloat over Bin Laden's eternal fate.

Hypocrisy
Every time Americans die and we see scenes of jubilant crowds of radicals chanting and laughing and cheering 'Victory!' I get pissed off. They spit on the graves of brave men and women who fought hard for what they believed, they dishonor people I esteem as noble. Yet, when we hear of the death of their leader, we cheer and spit upon HIS grave. I was upset by those images much the same way I was upset by the images of the terrorist radicals celebrating. I felt that many of us are angered over seeing our enemies doing the same thing were doing our own happy dance over this. Are celebrations justified? Absolutely. But we must be better than that. I see celebrations like the one the mother of a victim of 9-11 had this morning. She was pleased, thankful, and content- but she was respectful. I saw two gentlemen who lost family and friends in the Towers that day. They were glad he was dead, but somber in their expression of it. I agree with the words of President Obama- "Justice is served." In our human eyes, yes this is true. Bin Laden is in the hands of God's Justice now. Let us be the better people. Let us be respectful.

Praying for the Enemy
I can recall a handful of times that I prayed for the salvation of Osama Bin Laden. To me, the greatest justice possible would be for him to find the errors of his ways and turn to Christ- then accept the punishment due him in this life. Jesus told us to love our enemies and pray for those who persecute us. Then He lived that out when He said from the Cross- "Father, forgive them for they know not what they do." I pray today for the thousands (or more) followers of Bin Laden. They too can know Christ- it is not impossible for God (Matthew 19:26). Make no mistake, these people are our enemies. They despise our culture, hate our Savior, and want many of us dead. Should we then debase ourselves to their level and wish them dead? Or should we rise above that fray, live the example of Christ, and hope for their rescue from a life that leads to Hell?

I cannot tell you what to feel or believe or do in light of this event. I can only share with you my struggle, my view of this historic happening. I am glad for the victims of Bin Laden, for our country, for our armed forces, and for the world that a man who did such evil is gone. Yet I am broken over the fact that Hell awaits all who reject Jesus- be they your neighbor the banker or Bin Laden the terrorist.

With that, I ask that you seek to see this as God sees it. That you soberly look at the reality of our choices. Yes, he deserves to rot in Hell.

But so do I.

My sin made Jesus' death necessary. I am guilty.

But by His blood, I am rescued- that makes all the difference.

Miracle Drug

A few weeks ago, I got the flu. I believe it was the first time since I was a kid that I contracted this really annoying little bug, despite never getting a flu vaccine. Now, once I had the flu, I wanted the drugs. I needed the drugs. And nothing would keep them from me.

Tamiflu is expensive, for the record. Sure, compared to some heart meds and other triple digit dollar amount drugs, it's nothing. So, I had a brief moment of hesitation when forking over the $60 for the pills, but the chills started to kick back in. I got over it. Then the next day, both my kids were diagnosed with the influenza, and my wife was put on Tamiflu as a preventative measure. It was expensive, but this time I had no hesitation. We all needed to do what was explicitly necessary to kill this germ that wreaking havoc on our family before it got worse. We wanted the miracle drug to work.

I've been reading Crazy Love, by Francis Chan, with my friend Eric. In it, Chan relates the story of a college student asking a very potent and piercing question: "Why would a loving God force me to love Him?"

The truth is, I've heard this before. The truth is also that it is easy to see where this mentality comes from. I mean, if you don't love God, you die the big Death with a capital D. If you don't follow Jesus, you are separated from the Father. It's kind of totalitarian, if you'll allow me that strong term. Yeah, I see that there is a bit of forcing us to choose God coming from God Himself. The Bible is full of people that were "strongly encouraged" to choose God.

I admit: It seems rather harsh that God essentially says choose me or you can go to Hell. Literally.

But, what if it's necessary?

I didn't really want to take my flu meds. They made me kinda nauseous at first. They cost more money than I wanted to spend. But if I wanted to get over the flu quickly, there was NO OTHER WAY to go.

If we created a miracle drug that cured all ailments- from cancer to AIDS to headaches to the common cold- and you had to take it just once- would you take it? It would cost you a lot of money, but you'd not have to worry about health care ever again. You'd never need to take another pill of any kind for the rest of your life. The catch is, there is no other company or industry that will ever be able to manufacture this drug, so you have to take it from this company. You are being, in essence, forced to support this company.

For a lifetime of good health by taking one pill- it's worth it, isn't it?

Matthew 9:12 says: On hearing this, Jesus said, “It is not the healthy who need a doctor, but the sick.

When we realize we are sick, we will do whatever it takes to get well. Be told you have cancer, and your first thoughts upon soaking that in will be "What can we do?" Have a heart attack, and you want to know what you have to do to prevent that from happening again.

You want the drugs/treatment/surgery that makes it better.

Now, you're sick. All of us are. We WILL die from it. The question is can we be cured from eternal death and get eternal life? If there was a way to get that, and only one way to get that, would it be worth it?

Would you not, if you knew of a way to cure a loved one from cancer or AIDS or heart disease, do every thing within your power to make them pursue that course of treatment? Would you not force them?

Of course you would. Because you love them. You'd move mountains if you could to help the ones you love.

If God is 'forcing' us to love Him- and I don't see it that way- it is because He loves us. Now, the way I see it, if God has the Miracle Drug to cure us from this Death that awaits us- it's not Him forcing us to love Him. It is Him offering us the pill- the only one of its kind- that will save us. Accepting and returning the Love of God is the Miracle Drug.

And He is the only one making it.

We can still choose to reject Him, He does allow for that. I could have chosen to refuse my Tamiflu and struggled through it on my own. I probably would have made it. Thousands of patients every day choose not to take the pill or the chemo or the surgery because they have the same choice as we do. They can say 'No' to the well meaning doctor and family members pleading, pushing and yes, forcing them to take the cure.

But the truth is, you cannot reject God and live for eternity. It's not Him forcing you.

It is Him doing everything to save you.

I Am Not My Sin

So, last night Kristin and I sat down to watch "Pray the Gay Away" on OWN ( Yep, I am surrendering my guy card for that one.) Basically, the show was looking at ministries like Exodus Ministries that works with Christians who are gay, but want to overcome those urges, and also the flipside to that: Christians who are gay and feel that is just who they are and don't need to change it. The first half hour was mostly about Exodus and a woman with her own ministry/a guy she has worked with for four years. The second half hour was about a camp for gay students where they can be "gay and Christian." In the midst of this pretty compelling show, I noticed something seemed to be recurring in the words of the people: Identity. Those wanting to be free of the homosexual urges and those wanting to embrace them both talked a lot about their identity and the confusion of what to do when their very personal urges conflicted with their very personal- and on both sides, vibrant- faith.

Let me just say, for clarity, where I stand. I believe that the Bible teaches homosexuality is wrong. It is a sin. But it is no more vile a sin than murder, lying, looking at pornography, getting drunk or cheating on your taxes. Being gay does not merit a total rejection from God and a denial of entrance to heaven. Homosexuals are people that God loves dearly, and as His children, we are to love them as well. But I am concerned about the way in which we are trying to make this sin 'okay' and I am concerned with the growing trend to say that "gay is how I was made and, therefore, who I am."

As I was watching the show, God seemed to be teaching me something not just about this particular sin, but all sin: We identify ourselves by it. Think about it, you call yourself an alcoholic if you can't stop drinking. You call yourself a liar if you can't ever seem to tell the truth. You label yourself a porn addict if you can't stop searching the internet for porn. And if you have committed some crime like murder or sexual assault you bear that label for the rest of you life- regardless of what comes after. It seems that no matter who we are deep down, our sins still define us to those around us- and even to ourselves.

Batman Begins has this theme running through it. It is the line "It's not who you are on the inside, but what you do that defines you." In context, it means if you are a good person deep down, but do nothing good, can you really be good? It rings very near to "faith without works is dead." In our world, it seems that it doesn't matter if you believe in Jesus in your heart, we are defined more by our sin and our actions (and maybe our inactions) than what we believe. Clearly, the truth is that what we do does define us to those around us. They can't know our heart, but they can see our actions. The problem comes when we define ourselves by our action, by our sin, rather than by the owner of our heart.

Paul writes in 1 Corinthians 6:9-11 about this issue:

Or do you not know that wrongdoers will not inherit the kingdom of God? Do not be deceived: Neither the sexually immoral nor idolaters nor adulterers nor men who have sex with men nor thieves nor the greedy nor drunkards nor slanderers nor swindlers will inherit the kingdom of God. And that is what some of you were. But you were washed, you were sanctified, you were justified in the name of the Lord Jesus Christ and by the Spirit of our God. (Emphasis mine)

As believers in Christ, we are to no longer identify ourselves as these sins. WE were these things, but we are washed, sanctified (made holy, set apart by God, for God), and justified ( made right with God's law) by Jesus. By His NAME. Our identity is to be in Christ, not in our addictions, our urges, our sins or our lifestyles. It is wrong for me to identify myself by my sin instead of by my Savior. To do so demeans the work of Christ.

But what about those who say they are, as Lady Gaga sings today, "Born This Way?"

OK, I'll give you that. While I believe God makes us without sin, we are born into a world that is fallen. Something happens to us when our souls put on this flesh- the Bible often refers to the flesh as sinful, by the way- that warps us. I believe that in the same way some of us are born with natural abilities, we are all born with natural bents to sin. This is not a result of the failure of God, rather it is a result of the Fall of Man. Some of us are born into a lifelong struggle with the bottle or with same-sex attraction. Some of us are born with a tendency toward violence or with a sociopathic lack of care for others. The fallen nature of this world messes us up. But there are millions of people born with these and other urges who daily fight them down- they deny the identity that were born as, repress it as the show last night often said- because they value something more than getting to be themselves.

That is the issue I have with sins that we claim we do just because it is how we are made. If we are believers in Christ, we were unmade in that image, and remade in the image of Christ. We may have been born with sinful desire, but we have been born again to desire Christ. To desire Him more than we desire ourselves. Yes, to even deny our most powerful, and most identity defining urges and longings, if they conflict with the One whose Name we now bear.

Adn when we fall again to those urges- because we will as long as we wear this flesh- we need offer forgiveness to ourselves and to others. I think the current president of Exodus Ministries (himself a man who was actively homosexual but is now married), who got the last word last night, said it best. As the show closed, he was asked if he thought that Christians who were gay would still get to go to heaven. He responded by sayin that yes, he believed that. That though they sinned, God was big enough to forgive them, because what mattered was that Jesus was in their heart, regardless of the struggles they still fall to.

Is Jesus Legalistic or Grace?

I don't speed.

I just don't do it. I keep my cruise set at whatever the speed limit is posted at and don't rise above or below it. I don't do it because I'm a good person, I do it because I hate spending money on things I don't want. Like tickets.

I guess if I'm honest, I follow most rules simply because I don't like the consequences of not following them. I don't love laws- in fact I think we have too many. (I don't like the government telling me how long I have to keep my kid in a car seat- which since my kids are tiny will be until they get their license.) But I keep them because I don't want to pay a fine or hear the harsh clang of steel bars. To be fair, some laws I follow because I feel morally obligated- like the whole not killing or stealing or committing adultery (which is most definitely a spiritual law, not a judicial one in our society).

It could be said we have laws for lots of reasons like safety and civility. I think we also have laws to make us feel in control. If we obey the rules, we know we are good people and good people control their own destiny. We like rules because they tell us just what we need to do.

God knew this about us, which is why He gave us the Commandments. He knew we'd never figure it out on our own, and we felt we needed to control our own lives, so He gave us Laws. With Laws came consequences and punishments. With consequences and punishment came judgment. With judgment came Pharisees. With Pharisees came Jesus. And with Jesus came fulfilment.

The Law is not the problem, even if that is what much of the world would have you believe. They say the problem with God is that He has too many rules, and thus He is no fun. Jesus walked into the world and said, very clearly, that the rules were not going away just because He came. No, they were in fact going to be fulfilled. This was what we call a 'bummer' to the Jews, a society oppressed with countless laws on top of the Law. See, they were burden by laws that men made to make God's Law more difficult to live by. Laws that took away freedom. Laws that bound the keeper- not to God, but to the laws. In simplistic terms, they no longer refused to murder because the loved God, they refused to murder because they loved the law.

Jesus came on and said that the law stands, but what needs to change is our reasoning for keeping it. We don't keep it for fear of consequence, or for respect for the man-made institutions that keep the law: we are to keep the Law out of Love for God. And Jesus set out to keep the Law. That is, the Law of God, not the Pharisaical law. See, he came to expose the control-minded laws of man by living out the Laws of God. Law Lovers say it is more important to pass the injured man by if it is the Sabbath (day of rest), lest we help him and sin by breaking the Sabbath. God Lovers say it is more important that the man be rescued so that he can enjoy the restful day of Sabbath and those that follow. Jesus healed on the Sabbath, Pharisees let you rot. The Law had been allowed to make us selfish- legalism was about making sure we were right to the exclusion of concern for others.

Jesus fulfilled the Law by completing the "don't" laws as well as the "do" laws. Not only did He abstain from murder, theft, adultery and the lot, He fully engaged in caring for His fellow humans and worshiping God. More than that, He fulfilled the Law of God by taking the punishment the Law owed to all who fell short. His death was fulfilment in that the punishment for all sin was given to the one man who didn't deserve it. He became the scapegoat ( a Jewish tradition of sending a goat covered with the sins of the people out in the wilderness to die, thus taking the people's sin with it) for all of mankind. Our sins died with Him, even though He didn't deserve to die and we didn't deserve to live.

So, the age old question of whether Jesus was about the Law or about Grace is answered in true, God-like fashion: He's both. On this side of the Cross, we have the Grace covering our screw-ups, but there is still this expectation that we would seek to live to please God. And that's just it- we should follow God's Laws not for the sake of following the rules, or being a good person, but for the love we have for our God. The kind of Law following Jesus shows us is the kind that puts the focus on God- never on us. We would fall forever short of the scrutiny and intricacies of the Law.

But Jesus can take it. And He did.

For us.

Flag Football Grace

Today I am sore.

It takes great pains to lift my legs when walking. Rising from my chair requires a groan and many wobbles. I have a finger that is a lovely shade of purple.

This is all because, yesterday, I played flag football with our church. This translates into three people over the age of 30 playing with and against nine people under the age of 25. Six years makes a great deal of difference. I learned this among much other vitally important stuff.

For one, I learned that coordination at 31 is not what it was at 21. I learned that when the momentum of the upper body exceeds the terminal velocity of the lower body, one can enter into a "head skid." I learned that after falling on the ground, rolling is an excellent way to prevent your flags from being pulled- but it is not a legal way to gain yards. I learned that one's wife will, on instinct, trip you to prevent you from sacking her teammate. Lastly, I was reminded of what if feels like to be trapped.

I got to quarterback a few times, and each time, a rush came at me. What often happened was the rushers simply pushed the defenders back with them, so anywhere from three to five people were suddenly all in my space, with no way out. Running around it wasn't an option all that often (see the above mentioned age difference), so you often had to through up a hopeful pass or take the sack. Fortunately, we were playing flag football. Mostly. ( See above mentioned wife defensive strategy.)

It's one thing to feel trapped in a friendly flag football game. It's a totally different kind of trapped when you feel attacked- physically, spiritually, or emotionally. For me, the trapped feeling comes in one of two ways most often: from increased stress or from sin. Usually, they eventually tag team me.

I've felt trapped lately. Temptations rise around me like a defensive line going for the sack. The walls close in and I feel trapped, I can't see a way out of them. I can run for a bit, but I grow tired and the assailants don't. I look for a way out, but the added stress makes me question every decision, every way out is shut down by my feeling of oppression. The loss I take is much more deadly than taking a couple yards for a sack.

Praying the other day, I felt it impressed upon me to read Psalm 40. It's the one that starts out talking about waiting patiently for the Lord, then Him hearing the cry. U2 made a song about it:


In the middle of the Psalm, comes a plea. It comes from the depths of the man, of David who is no stranger to heart wrenching failure and oppression.

11 Do not withhold your mercy from me, LORD;
may your love and faithfulness always protect me.
12 For troubles without number surround me;
my sins have overtaken me, and I cannot see.
They are more than the hairs of my head,
and my heart fails within me.
13 Be pleased to save me, LORD;
come quickly, LORD, to help me.

So often, it feels our heart fails. We know what is right, we know what is good. We know what hurts God, hurts those we love, hurts ourselves. But we grow weak in the moment. We give a little ground, and the sin takes the field in a stunning blitz we weren't prepared for. Our troubles overtake us, our sins overwhelm us and we can no longer see our salvation. So, in our moment of desperation, we throw up a prayer blindly. We hope it will find it's intended target before we take the sack. We can't see Him out there, we just hope He is 'pleased to save me.'

I don't know how He does it. I don't know why and definitely not when He does it. But He saves us. Not just that first time when we first meet Him, but daily. He does hear us, and though His answer is not always immediate, He does rescue us. HE snatches our plea for rescue from the air and brings it down securely in His possession. Then He helps us.

He calms us if we will listen for Him and wait for Him. He heals us if we are willing to forgive ourselves for getting into the mess in the first place. He restores us if we are willing to shed the sin that has grown painfully into our skin. And make no mistake, ridding our lives of sin will hurt. Maybe it's the mild removal of a splinter kind of hurt, maybe it's an amputation kind of hurt. Either way, removing a sin that has become a part of you would kill you- if you weren't already dead to sin but alive in Christ (Romans 6:11).

My soreness today reminds of a good memory- a great game with good friends. The soreness of sin however reminds us of how quickly we can get lost in the old us. If only we would remember the pain of sin when in the midst of pursuing it again. There is another ache, however, that rises when we perpetually return to our old sins. It is the ache of longing for God. The ache of losing sight of Him, of broken relations with Him. Of a heart that has failed.

Sin leads to death. Death comes from a heart that has failed- both physically and spiritually.

So if your heart is failing, your options for escape have faded away or you've given up on them, lift your eyes to patch of sky that is still visible in your haze. It's there, trust me. Throw your last hope for rescue at it, trusting in a God you've strayed from but who has never left you. It's not logical, it's not good football strategy to toss a blind pass in the vain hope your receiver will snag it.

It's a good thing Jesus isn't like a flag football receiver, isn't it?