Freedom

The last few days here in College Station have been beautiful. Now, admittedly, my view of beautiful weather is probably a bit skewed, but the gray rainy days are my favorites. Today is the first day since Monday that we have made it to the 80s, Tuesday and Wednesday we never left the 60s.

Its about this time of year that I begin to feel trapped at work. My office is windowless, and stuffy. When I get out, I generally have to spend my time in musty old rooms filled with giant record books. But between my office and the records, I have maybe a hundred yards of cool, fresh Fall air to soak up. Like a gateway drug, it only leaves me wanting more. So, I am trying to find excuses to escape the confines that come with the job.

One way is to go to campus and do a little work from there. It allows me the chance to see reminders of why we're here, as thousands of college students walk by, heads down, ears plugged with I-pods and such, and backs burdened with books. I get the chance to pray for them, and get some work done at the same time, and enjoy the air.
I also find myself going and simply walking around the backyard. The soggy yard squishing water with every step, the smell of the wet cedar fence, the cool breeze that will occasionally shock my lung with it's suddenness. They make me feel alive. They remind of Falls growing up, Friday's after school, in the hours between class's end and the games that night. Though I never played football, there was a sense of expectancy in those hours, a sense of...freedom.

As those memories play through my mind, I think a lot about freedom. We are given life to experience it. I watch my girls, Leslie trying out her new gymnastics moves, bounding about, and Kenna twirling as she and Kristin watch Dancing With The Stars. they are living, not bound to the worries of bills, and responsibilities, and concerns. They are free. In a lesser way, the college students we work with are free, too. They are spreading their wings, learning through trial and error who they really are. They test themselves to see their limits, but they still have more freedom to dream of futures untold, to try new things free of the burdens of full time jobs (for some, anyway).

But lest you think I feel trapped by life, I need you to know that actually, I feel more free than I have in a long time. I would love to be full time with the Gate, setting my own hours so I could go with Leslie to gymnastics every week, and then swing by campus for an hour or two to meet with students, or staying out way too late because I could sleep in the next day. That's still a long way off, but for now, I feel free because God has allowed us to pursue this dream, to be in the lives of some college students and young adults as they navigate these vital years. As we walk with them, we can live their freedom with them a bit. Movie nights, disc golf, coffee shops, talking through relationship issues, seeking answers to tough God stuff- it is freeing.

Now, if you'll excuse me, I must go walk on my soggy yard.