Where we've been...

With the year at an end, I thought I'd review the year we've had in our house and church.

January: The year started off terribly, with the passing of Kristin's dad. He had fought his cancer bravely and won, but the cost of the battle was too much for his body to handle. This loss was tempered with our faith in Wayne's destination and the life he had lived.

February: Kristin had a lump in her leg that was causing all sorts of problems, including making it hard to walk. The family doctor found it too difficult to remove, so we got passed to a genreal surgeon, still not knowing what it was, even after a CT scan. Which, by the way, is waaay expensive. After the surgery, we found out it was Cat Scratch Fever (seriously, it IS a real disease). I laughed, Kristin was not humored.

March: We caught enough of a breather to start launching the Gate, and had some students over for hamburgers.

April: The Gate begins meeting on Mondays for conversations, a small group. We start with 5, plus our two girls. It goes well.

May: Kristin begins to experience flare ups of her recurring stomach issues, the Gate presses on and we prepare for...

June: ...when Wally and Crissy Wellborn, our fellow church planters get moved to BCS. We eat out way too much. Kristin is not feeling better.

July: After having reached as many as 10 in Conversations, most of the students head home for the summer, and the numbers drop to 5, we begin to start looking to what we need to be in the fall. Kristin stomach illness is really bad, and we don't like doctors that can't see sick people.

August: We finally get fed up with the family doctor and get started with a gastro specialist. We make the bold decision with the Gate to have a public service, at a bar. We have about two weeks to find a bar, a worship leader, do publicity, and freak out.

September: Kristin has a colonoscopy/endoscopy and we discover she has a hiatal hernia in her esophagus and reflux as the issue. We become fans of Nexium. Kristin starts work at Mother's Day Out at Hillcrest Baptist Church, and the girls begin their first daycare type experience. They all love it. We get ready to launch the church ... and wait 3 weeks while Hurricanes Gustav and Ike take aim at us. Gustav missed, and Ike was an irritant, but its effects on the coast sent evacuees to BCS, and our plan for publicity was affected. Finally, after three postponements, we have a booth at Breakaway (college Bible Study on Campus) and get buzz as the 'Bar church.' The first service launches with 19 people, including kids and nursery workers. We did find a worship leader and we were meeting at Hurricane Harry's once a month. Despite a multitude of tech issues, the night went pretty well.

October: Second Harry's service and we join up with the Aggie Baptist Student Ministry for their midnight pancake feed on Northgate (bar central here) on Halloween. Drunk people are funny. Costumed drunk people are hi-larious.

November: Final Harry's service of the semester, and we decide right before Thanksgiving to bake and give out 1000 Christmas cookies before finals, which was in a week. Our oven almost died of exhaustion. We had to put the family cat, Lucky, down. It was tough.

December: We got snow in College Station, and the girls got to play in it. It was about 2-3 inches, and it was amazing. Then, a week or so before Christmas everyone got sick. Twice. Except me. I just got sick on Christmas Eve. Not cool.

So that is the Lehrmann year in review. I'll post back soon with our hopes and pursuits for 2009.

Got this song stuck in my head...

So after a day of dealing with a sick kid, the little one, I was frustrated. I tend to get kind of...negative when things are tough. I see the worst, expect more bad, act kinda pouty. You know, like any 4 year old would.
Kristin was on the phone, Les on the Computer, Kenna starting to feel better and watching her shows on TV, so I, out of boreddom, started doing dishes. A note here, I have found that doing dishes while listening to the I-Pod on its speakers makes it a more bearable experience. (Shhhh, don't tell Kristin)
So, Charlie Hall's "You are God" rolls onto the I-Pod. And I soak it in. And hit repeat. Again. Again. And what sticks the most is the line "He's closer than our troubles." I often claim to feel like God is distant when things are tough, yet if He is in us, He is in fact nearer than our troubles, even the ones we make worse by dwelling on them and getting heartsick over. I think He looks at us and shakes his head, not out of frustration, but out of sorrow. Sorrow that we have not looked to Him.
Which is the second revelatory verse in the song: "We are stunned with wide eyed wonder." I have been stunned by a sight before, as recently as this past week when College Station got covered in a couple inches of snow. The beauty was enormous, compounded by the fact that it has not snowed here like that in, according one person on the local station, nearly 2 decades. It was a new thing, a site unexpected, yet longed for. And when it was seen, it was only then that I realized how much I missed it, needed it, and just how much it moved my heart.
You know, like when we realize God is there, as He has been all along, closer than our troubles.
I miss Him, and I need Him, and I believe He is near, and, to paraphrase Elijah, I believe He is "turning my heart back again."

Hey! We have a blog!

Yeah, its been a while. But in all fairness, a lot has happened in a month...or two.
*We had a week with 3 birthdays, Halloween, a ministry project on Northgate on Halloween (Costumed drunk people are funny), and a church worship service. I don't recommend this regularly.
*An early start to Christmas lights, as we got ripped off on Christmas last year due to moving in December and other things.
*A small incident involving a moose adorned with Christmas lights, and a human finger.
*Another small incident involving a car door and another human finger, same day.
*And I have had nothing to say.

Sooooo, food for thought. One other thing that happened was an historic election, in which many of our conservative friends concerned about socialism rising in the US had a minor meltdown. This is understandable, but the food for thought is this: If the Church had done a better job of caring for the poor, would the socialist programs we are now faced with ever have been needed?

What can the church do, you ask? Look at Rockdale, TX, where the major employer in town closed, creating vast unemployment. The Ministerial alliance there did not look to government for a bailout, they did what many churches would never do: Held a benefit for the unemployed workers to raise money for their families while they searched for employment.

I applaud these ministers for sharing the love of Christ by first meeting the needs of those nearest to them.

Big Weekend

So we decided to see how many things we could cram into one 3 day period. On Friday, I (Chad) took off for the day so we could host a table for the Gate at the Baptist Student Ministry. We were there for about 2 hours or so, and gave away a lot of goody bags (with scantrons, a popular thing around test time here). We met some fun people, and continued to build the buzz of 'the church in the bar' as one girl called us, after remembering us from Breakaway.
We left with little wiggle room to make it to the next event, Homecoming Parade in Mart, my hometown. Luckily ( said with THICK sarcasm) we made it just as the obscenely obnoxious train horn was let loose, repeatedly. I hate train horns on trains, and they are worse on purple golfcarts.
After that, we went to Mom's (or Gammana, as the girls call her. Its a combo of Gamma and Nana.) house for BBQ from my childhood church. Then there was the game, which was good for the seeing of some old friends, and the rare opportunity to spot a slight celebrity in the form of the local guy now starring on Friday Night Lights.
Saturday was my 10 year reunion. Kristin had worried she wouldn't know anyone, but soon found she had met almost half the people there, which was about half my class, or 20 ish of 40 ish. I loved seeing how everyone initially greeted everyone, then soon fell back to the groups they hung with High School. Its funny how people change, one guy was married with a kid, and I had thought just the night before how he might have been the guy knocking off the bank on the news the night before. Everyone was more grown up looking, yet still who they were back then.
Sunday was the Gate's second service at Harry's, and we gathered with the expectation of possibly less people than the first night. We were right, but not by much, and we were surprised to meet 3 new faces. One came with one of our regulars, the other two remembered us from Breakaway, a month before. They had to call friends who went clubbing to find us, as we neglected to put up an address for the bar. It was exciting to see that some things were really starting to get going, and we are hopeful for the next meeting on the 2 of November.

"Who are you voting for?"

Its on everyone's mind. Most people have an opinion, and its usually pretty strong. And it seems in the last few years, people of faith have increasingly been vocal about their view of politics. I think its great. And I think its terrible.

Its great because we are in a democracy and we have every right to speak out and vote for and support whoever we want. Recently, as people rallied to oppose- or support- the bailout, we saw a great picture of democracy at work. It also exposed how far from a true democracy we are when despite nearly half the nation opposed to it, many of our 'representatives' still pressed on with it. Aren't they supposed to listen? And kudos to those who did vote based on their constituents opinion, whether it was for or against. Christians, along withother Americans, spoke out, and were heard.

But its also terrible. Its terrible because it often seems to me that we are more concerned, or dare I say worried, about who will be president than about the cause of Christ. And we so vehemently support who we think should win, that we often feel a personal stake in it. When someone says they support the other guy, we have an immediate pause, 'How can they vote for________?' It works the other way. So many people assume that when they are talking to a Christian, they are talking to a Republican, and for a lost world that may not be Republicans, thats an immediate conversation ender. No chance to talk about Jesus there.

Now, I'm not saying don't be political. But maybe lets not frame everything by it. I remember when we used to frame things by the teachings of Jesus, not the policies of Washington. In the grand scheme of things, no matter who wins, the president will succeed at some things and fail at others. You will disagree with their stance sometimes, and support them at others. But whoever wins, I believe God has ALLOWED them to. Some will say we could end up a fascist state, or a socialist state, if we don't vote right. To that I say, "God has seen worse." The thing is, while this election is maybe the most important in our lifetime (at least since four years ago, when it was last said to be the most important of our lifetime), it is still a lesser thing when compared to the movement of God.

So if you have to choose between a political rally and serving your lost neighbor, I hope you choose to serve. If its money to the campaign or money to the missionary, I hope its the missionary. If its arguing with a person over politics or telling them of God's love, which one is of true eternal value?

Their campaigns may hold them as 'saviors' but they are just men. So when you ask me who I'm voting for, I probably won't tell you. It is a 'secret ballot' afterall.



Oh, and to the ministers who last week decided to endorse a candidate and violate their tax exempt status, please stop talking. You have ignored not only that tax law, you have ignored the command of God to respect your authority. The government didn't say to not speak of God ( a holy and Biblical reason to ignore the law), but your actions have opened the door for that option to someday be possible.

The heart of all this is that I feel we are not abiding by Matthew 6:25-34. God will take care of us, or He will take us. Trust me, as a recovering worrier, I need to hear that as much as anyone else these days.

Standing on the Precipice

As I type, we are on the eve of the biggest night of our minstry lives, maybe more. At 7 p.m., Sunday, September 21, 2008, the Gate will go public. After a flurry of last minute 'advertising' (meaning we gave a lot of college students free stuff and a card) we are set to open the doors of a bar and have worship. Boy, is that an odd sentence.
There is excitement and hope, fear and uncertainty, prayer and preparation, and a hyper sensitive computer keyboard that keeps jumping my cursor around and seriously ticking me off. A last minute (literally, we met with him Friday, and he called back today during the Aggie 'game') worship leader has been added, and we are super excited that God has put a lot of things together in just the last 48 hours or so.
So what do we expect? We may have 20, we may have 200. God may show up and they love it, or He may not. But we have trusted and walked with Him this far, and we will walk a little further tomorrow. All we ask is that those of you reading this, walk a little with us in prayer.

Trials and Victory

So, I completely forgot to blog for over a month. Oops. Anyway, what's been going on with us? Well, first is my health. I, Kristin, have been sick sporadically since Memorial Day weekend back in May. On average it's happened once every 7-10 days. Without getting too graphic it's an icky sick you wouldn't wish on your worst enemy. It completely wipes me out and I tend to lose about 4 pounds per day when it happens. I gain most of it back, but sometimes my stomach shrinks and it doesn't all come back. It's been funny to hear peoples' comments when I see someone I haven't seen in a while. "Kristin, you look great! How much weight have you lost and what are you doing to lose it?" Well, let's just say after having 2 kids I'm back down to what I weighed the day I got married, and slowly getting close to my high school weight. I don't recommend this diet. It's miserable and food, at times, seems to be the enemy. I've been going to doctors about it for a few months now, and am excited that I will be having and Endoscopy/Colonoscopy done this coming Monday. It's the first step in figuring out what is causing all of this craziness. I think I'll be able to handle it better when we can nail down what we're dealing with.

Another hard and very sad thing that has happened is my best friend (who I actually consider my sister) lost her husband on August 7th. He was 28 years old. They were married for four years and she is now a widow at 28. They did not have any children. Right now I don't feel the need or desire to share the details of what happened. Cyberspace is huge and it's a very personal matter. Please just pray for her and his family. It is and will continue to be a VERY difficult time.

I look back on 2008 and know this is the hardest year of my life. Not only have I had these health issues and the loss of an extended family member, but in January I also lost my dad to complications of a stem cell transplant that he had done because he was diagnosed with a very rare form of Leukemia. I also had minor surgery back in February to remove my Lymphnode because it swelled up to the size of a golf ball. I was also having headaches, back aches, loss of appetite and some other symptoms. Came to find out all of that was caused by "Cat Scratch Fever." (Yes, it's a real illness, and also a very catchy song. Ted Nugent was running through my head for weeks.) On top of all this, we are planting a church from scratch.

Just for the record...Satan is VERY real and there is no doubt in my mind that spiritual warfare is happening all around my family. I'm not sure why, but I know my God is a mighty warrior and He will WIN! God sees the big picture, and while right now I feel beaten down, weak, and weary...God will use all of this for His glory and His purpose. He NEVER promised the Christian life would be easy (like so many Christians tell people, which REALLY gets on my nerves), but He did promise He would never leave me. As long as I keep turning to Him in my cofussion, anger (yes, I've shaken my fist at God with one hand, but kept a tight hold of Him at the same time with the other), and fear, then I know He will see me through. I'm His creation and He loves me more than I can even understand. What a comfort it is that He is walking with me through this tough journey. He's pretty nifty like that. :o)

If its not one thing, its 17 others

I remember a church planter once telling me that church planting was the Marine Corps of Ministry- first in, face the tough stuff, and not everyone survives.
I never doubted that, but I never realized how spiritual the attacks can be. And sometimes, how physical they can be.
We were set to launch Sept. 7th, but due to Hurricane Gustav displacing some folks to Reed Arena here in College Station, Breakaway's ministry fair (where we were to do the bulk of our publicity) was bumped back a week. We followed suit.
And I was bit relieved, because we are dealing with an illness in the family that is rather time consuming for us all. This illness is recurring, and seems to hit when someone in the family has something to do, or the church takes a step forward. Close on the heels of the illness will come the spiritual attacks, the fears, the doubts, the temptations, and ultimately the hopelessness. Before God steps in and rescues us. Which He usually does.
There are times I cry out for something to give, for some sliver of hope. For some rest.
But there are spiritual beachheads to take, lost people in need of rescue, and others far worse off than us.
Take heart, He has overcome the world.

Why we call the church the Gate

Things have been really busy lately, lots of things we're working through as we get closer to the launch date of the church. We are planning on our first public service on September 7th, and so I woud like to take this opportunity to explain why we call the church the Gate.
I'm a big believer that a church's name says a lot about it. I once saw a church called New Energy Baptist Church. Right next to it sat the New Energy Cemetery. Good name for a church, questionable name for a cemetery.
A church's name can convey things overtly, such as denomination (Something Baptist/Methodist/Bible?Etc. Church), or things more subtly (like a more traditional approach when named a common name like a first First Church or church named after the town). Nothing wrong with this, but in a town like College Station, who needs a First Church of Aggieland?
So, why the Gate? Lots of things played into the name. For one, 'gates are common around here, like Northgate. Gates get a lot of play in Scripture as well. Jacob has his vision of heaven and says "Surely this is the gate of heaven." A bold assertion, but we can hope, right? The entrances to the city of Jerusalem were gates, with names like Lion's Gate, New Gate, and even a Dung Gate, but we didn't want to go there. Jesus says he is the Gate, and since we're pointing to Him, we figured it would be okay.
Despite all this, we are the Gate for something else. While not excluding anyone, we are actively seeking people between the ages of 18 and 30ish. Think about those twelve or so years. People leave home, go to college, start jobs, start families, establish homes of their own, and begin the journey toward the rest of their life. It is a time of constant transition, things always change. Its not really a place of permanence, but a place between childhood and adulthood (Yes, you're an adult at 18, but most of us are not fully settled into adulthood until our thirties. Wasn't that the premise of the show Friends- people making the choices that will shape the rest of their lives?) A gate is not a place, it is a place between.
As the Gate, we desire to walk with people in this 'place between.' We are all learning, growing and making decisions that shape our lives, not just for the next 60+ years , but for eternity. Each choice you make takes you through another gate, closer to or further from God.
But as we say, "Faith is a journey that starts with one choice."
Our church is not that first choice , but we know the Man who is.

Semantics, or Verbal Acrobatics

This past week, a few of us have started to talk through the vision statement of the Gate. It leads us to an issue I have been thinking through for some time about how the church talks. We have some great words, like "salvation," "sanctification," "supplication," and those are just some of the "s-'s." The problem is that there are a lot of people in the church that don't know what some of them mean, let alone the people who are outside the doors. I'm not advocating dropping the words at all, but I do think a bit of explaination is necessary for non-regulars to to get an idea of what is going on.
An example: Some good friends of mine are computer guys. I've actually heard them joke about someone who "doesn't even know how much RAM he has." It wasn't me they were talking about, but it might as well have been. Conversations with them often turn to computer stuff. I'm with them up to a point, but there are some words I just don't know. I know bandwidth has something to do with the internet and not the waistline of the drummer. Sometimes I wish they would hand me a list of terms with definitions so that when they come up in conversation, I might be able to keep up.
Sometimes I think new people coming to a church might feel like me in a room full of computer techs. "What does that mean?" "Jesus was WHAT so that we could WHAT?" "Er, what kind of bandwith is Jesus running with?"
So, if some day our church has meetings like other churches, and you visit, I hope to have someone hand you a Glossary of Terms. As we talk of God and use those great, lasting, powerful words like Salvation, you'll understand what we mean.
But if you have computer questions...

Layin' Down the Law

Ugh. So here's the story of our lunch time today. I heated up some leftover pizza (always a favorite...or so I thought). Leslie asked if we could have a picnic in the playroom and since they were really sweet this morning I decided that was a good idea, too. Leslie sat down and I put Kenna's bib on her and sat her down as well. I then went into the kitchen to fix my lunch. It wasn't long before I heard Leslie, or "Little Momma" as we call her, tell her little sister "Kenna, sit down and eat!" I knew immediately what was going to happen. Kenna decided she didn't want to eat any pizza today. She had eaten ONE bite and thought that was enough. Well, I am NOT a short order cook, so Kenna was going to eat the pizza or nothing at all. Now something else you need to know is how much Kenna loves Winnie the Pooh. If he is anywhere in sight Kenna will spot the "cubby little tubby all stuffed with fluff". Now back to the story at hand. I had started a Pooh video for the girls right before lunch. So, I realize what my ammo is to make Kenna eat some more. Leslie finished her pizza. She asked is she could be excused. I told her she could and "why don't you go watch the Pooh video?" She responded, "OK!" and bounced off happily. Kenna thought she would get to go as well. This is where the battle began. I stopped her and told her she had to eat before she watched Pooh. The screaming that ensued was horrendous. I was in it now though. I had stated the law and now had to try my best to be consistent and follow through. (Sometimes that is the hardest part of parenting for me. I don't want to be the bad guy, but at times it is inevitable.) Anyway, she was being really stubborn which is a little strange since she is usually my laid back child. All she wanted was for me to hold her. I decided I couldn't give her what she wanted at that moment, so I ignored her. I got a load of laundry and put it in the washer while she followed me still screaming at the top of her lungs. After starting the washer I looked down at her and asked if she was ready to eat. She nodded and said, "uh huh." We walked back into the playroom, sat down on the floor and she ate 2 pepperonies. At that point I knew I had had enough and I was pretty sure she felt the same way. I wiped her tears, gave her a hug, and told her I was proud of her for eating more pizza.

So, how did I do? What would you have done in the situation? I'm open to comments and suggestions. Honestly, I'm just glad we both survived and I didn't scream or yell and loose my temper. I feel like I laid the law down in the end. She did eat more before she got to watch Pooh. Wasn't that the whole point anyway?

Counting the Cost

I recently saw the Dark Knight, and there was an interesting theme throughout the movie, for all the 'heroes.' It is one of sacrifice, of cost. Each of the protagonists faces a point where to continue in their mission is to face certain loss of something in the hope of victory over evil. The question that arises is, "Is what can be gained worth what might be lost?"

Jesus tells us in Luke 14 two parables about counting the cost. One has a man planning to build a tower and looking at his finances. The other is of a King about to go to war, who looks at the power and potential of his army. The moral in both being if you can't afford to build or to fight, don't.

When we first felt called to plant a church, we thought no cost was too high. This was vital, we had to do it, and if we did, we didn't care what it cost.

Multiple doctors visits, financial difficulties, and a year later, we often find ourselves regretting that we said that. We are barely starting and already so much opposition. Is it still worth it?

I don't think we'll know until its waaaay too late to back out. We're being tested, just like the heroes of the Dark Knight, and we may fail or succeed, but we have made a commitment to God. Its not easy, and we are in the relatively easy field of domestic church planting. What of believers who live in countries that outlaw Christianity? What of those who face martyrdom, or torture for their faith? Do they look at the possibilities for success as worth the cost?

Jesus concludes this passage by saying salt that has lost its saltiness is worthless. Huh? What does that have to do with counting the cost?

Everything. See if you foolishly pursue without considering how tough it can be, you get disheartened when it does get tough. You begin to give in, to quit, to die. You cease to be what you were called to be. You lose the saltiness of your salt.

So here we are, in the midst of the greatest challenge of our life. Will we lose our saltiness? Will we rise to the challenge?

In verse 33 of Luke 14, Jesus says we must be willing to lose it all to be his disciple. The hard lesson is that no matter what we fear we may lose it can never match what he gave up willingly on the cross. So yes, I believe, by His grace, we will endure, and we will rise. Not without our scars and wounds, but each of us who trust in Him will see Him. Your trial may be a mission, a church start, a struggle with sin, an uncertain future, an illness or any number of other things.

But take heart. He has overcome the world.

Mother - Hardest Job Ever!

Hey Y'all! This is Kristin. I figured since Chad wrote a post maybe I should too. I figured he will probably post about the Gate, so I'll be posting more about our lives in general. To start at the beginning Chad and I have been married 6 years. We have two little girls. Leslie is 3 1/2 years old and Kenna is 20 months. I am a stay-at-home mom. While I absolutely love it--it is the hardest job I've ever had! I'm thankful that God is allowing me to stay home with them. In NO way am I a perfect wife/mother. To prove that point I will let you in on what God has been teaching me the last week or so.

I have become a HUGE fan of the show "Jon and Kate Plus 8". As I watch in awe of how this family of ten relates to each other in their daily lives I realize Jon and Kate have given their children tons of fun opportunities. You see I have fallen deep into the "Selfish Mom Pit". I turn on the tv as soon as my girls get up in the morning and they watch HOURS of it during the day. I'm not talking like 2 hours it's more like 6-8 hours a day. I know this is completely wrong. I've had the attitude that I want to keep them out of my hair and quiet. As I watch Kate deal with 8 kids instead of just 2, God is showing me that I'm missing tons of fun, learning opportunities with my girls. So, now I'm trying to spend more quality time with them and enjoy the gift it is to stay at home with them during this busy, crazy, and AMAZING time in their lives.

So there you go. Just because I'm married to a minister doesn't mean I'm a perfect wife and mother. I just wanted to get that out early so people will see we struggle with the daily grind just like everyone else. One of our goals with this blog is to be completely real, honest, and transparent. We're not going to put on a facade. What you read is what you get. We desire to honor God more than anything else. Right now...I'm gonna take my girls outside to play in the sprinkler. I think that would make God smile. :)

Got a Story for Ya

A little over a year ago, Kristin and I (Chad) reached a fever pitch in our desire for something to give. Months, and in some ways years of questions, frustrations, fears, and longings came to a head. We were to start a church.
I don't know if you ever tried to start a church from scratch, but its not as easy at it looks. Unlike baking a cake, even if you have all the ingredients, how to put them together is no science, despite what some books and people tell you.
And then there's the little detail that all the ingredients are scattered about the country, and you don't yet know exactly what they are. So, the cake analogy becomes a scavenger hunt. Only finding what you want in the scavenger hunt often finds you reconsidering if that is what you really want or need. What we set out to be as a church was completely different by the time we moved to College Station, the site of our 'plant.' Gone was a desire to find funding, and be really structured. That was replaced by a very strong desire to just 'be.' Some call it 'organic,' we call it the Gate. Each step we take is into an unknown, we may rise or fall, go to the next level or step back. The things that remain are a desire to be a Servant Church and to engage and challenge the college students and young adults that most churches can't, don't, or won't reach.
See, we got to the place of being open to God's call to the unknown because we had grown bored of the lesser things that seem to bog down so many followers of Christ. Oh, we still do fall back into them, but we so hate to be stuck in that mediocrity of simply knowing about God and never encountering Him.
I guess this blog will be about that journey from here on out. It'll also be about our family's journey, and hopefully the funny stuff that happens to people who try new things.