Hope

If one needs to be reminded what hope looks like, one needs only to look at a child. Leslie has recently taken to informing people that when she turns five, she gets a scooter. This is because she asked for one at four, and we told her she had to be five before she could get one. Now, she expects it, kind of like she won't be surprised at all if she gets one, and it will just be like, "What took you so long?"
In that way, hope seems a lot like expectancy. And really, I think it is. Its also married very closely to faith, the whole- "Faith is being certain of what you hope for, and sure of what you cannot see." I really think this kind of certain hope that I see in our four year old is very similar to the certain Hope that the Bible talks of. Its not like the common idea of hope that says, "We'd really like this thing to happen even if it probably won't." Like hoping we win the lottery. No, its a hope that is more, "Hey God, I knew you'd come through."
We have the living hope of Christ when we look at life wiht an expectancy that God is revealed all around us. When the miracle comes through, AND when it doesn't. When we have victory AND when we lose it big time. Hope is knowing God is there with us. Hope is knowing He will always be with us.

Fear

Not too long ago, I was going into the hall closet to get the vacuum out. I opened the door, and as I looked where the vacuum was usually, I instead saw a small shape move very quickly toward me and squeak. No, not a mouse, Kenna. I jumped, and yelled myself, as I was not expecting anything to jump at me and Kenna, Leslie, and Kristin all got a good laugh out of it.

I enjoy spooking people, but I do not like it when fear sets in and takes a longer time to be shrugged off. I have found that fear really causes damage to me, especially in the area of faith. Fear about finances, health, conditions in the world at large all seem to settle in and eat away at my faith that God is big enough to handle it. Fear leads me to distrust God's goodness, or maybe just doubt that God's intentions towards me are less than good. What if I am to tested like Job, or 'left hanging' like John the Baptist? They did the right thing, and they suffered for it. The issue, I think, is that I am fearing circumstances more than the God who holds their reins.

Jesus told a man who was fearful of a terrible outcome, "Do not be afraid, just believe." More than just believe God is in control, but believe God. Believe He is good, just, righteous. Believe He is- period.

Because if God is real, and true, and good, and righteous, and just- He knows better than I what I can and should endure.

War Within

We have hit that stage of development for our kids where they are occasionally at war with each other. The other day, Leslie started putting notes up on her door saying (she tells us) "Leslie's Room, no Kennas allowed." And then helpfully put up a "Kenna's Room, no Leslies allowed" on her sister's door. So all is not lost.
But it does make me think about why we have a natural tendency to go to war with each other. I mean, the first sin (OK, the second after the actual Fall) was a brother killing a brother. Since then, we have warred and fought with each other in deserts and seas and fields and on Fox News.
Maybe we are so warlike because we are at war with ourselves, fighting the urges and feelings of our sinful nature, and it just oozes out of us. We devise rules for ourselves to protect ourselves from ourselves, then impose them on others who do not see the need. It resulted in the Crusades , and the Baptist Doctrine against dancing which just recently got a student suspended from a Christian school for going to another school's prom.
Romans 7 talks about this war within, and the fact that we know what is right, yet feel the need to do what is wrong. It wasn't easy for Paul, and it sure isn't easy for me. It's like blogging- I know I should, cuz I have this, but I don't, because I would rather Facebook, or watch TV or whatever. So in an effort to have something worthwhile to put up here, for the next few weeks, I'll blog a bit about the series we're doing at the Gate. Because what we need to have to do the right thing is more motivation than we have to do the wrong thing.

Kids say (and do) some strange stuff

OK, so we're trying to figure the best way to deal with Leslie saying "I wanna go to Harry's again," around strangers. Not odd in an of itself, but round here, "Harry's" is the name everyone calls the bar our church meets in. So strangers, who probably don't want to hang around the parents who take 2 and 4 year olds to the bar, think we have a barfly in training.

Some other things the kids have said or done lately:
Kenna-She comes sliding across the carpet on her knees, throws her hands up and says, "What am I doing?"
- We tell her to put up her toys, hand her some and send her on her way. She runs into Leslie, hands her the toys and runs off.
-If we call her anything but Kenna (Cutey, Happy, Silly, etc.) she kind of scowls and says, "I not ____, I Kenna!"
-Fits of crying come from her room at bedtime. "Whats wrong?" "I need my Alley (her monkey)?" Which is sitting beside her. We point this out. "Oh." Instant giggles from Kenna.

Leslie- Driving past a cemetery: "Hey, thats where they hide the bodies!"
-Leslie has an imaginary house, in California by the mountains, that changes colors. She also has two kids, whose name she can't remember and a car that changes colors.
-She names all of her stuffed animals (and the squirrel outside) names like Bowley. All the names end in -ley. Except her Beanie Baby bat--Bowleywing.
-Today, she got gum in her hair- "It just fell there." She now has about three inches less hair.

Much Ado About Stuff

Things have been busy. Since the Sunday Spring Break started, (it was 3 weeks ago) we have had 5 new people come to the Gate. The first of those 5, Daniel, has become our backup worship leader, and he is good. He has also brought 2 of those other 4 visitors, who have become involved. The other two came for the first time just last week, and they seemed very excited about it all. Enough to join the Gate on Facebook, anyway. Plus, some of our regulars have begun inviting people, and this Sunday could possibly be one of our biggest nights since we started weekly stuff. It is momentum, and it feels good. God has been showing up, and it makes all the difference.
Other things: We did Big Event with the church. Ours was not so big, as it took about 45 minutes. We did meet the family we worked for, as well as some relatives of one of our 'members.' (The ' ' are for the fact that we don't technically have members, not that we don't claim this person.)
The fence around our house is done. And I only had to get a tetanus shot, no stitches for this home improvement project. We have also painted our bedroom and bathroom, and are working on the kitchen- photos are going up on Facebook, if you care.
Leslie and Kenna got new swimsuits, and they want to go swimming. They apparently don't understand that water is cold in the spring.
So that's the buzz. Hopefully, I'll have more on the Gate next week.

Fences and the Appeal of God

This all started a month or so ago, when, while enjoying lunch with a co-worker, he asked how does God appeal to you? Not in the way you find a steak appealing or that great deal on a new car/camera/giant box of diapers, but in the way in which you are invited into something with Him. Michael, this co-worker (he's actually more of a boss, but a great man of God as well, hence this conversation) said he had spent a lot of time ruminating on John 1 and the way in which Jesus begins to call the disciples, and how each one gets a different appeal. The first two he spends the day with, the second he gives a name, the third he tells him what to do, the fourth he promises to show him amazing things.
So I've spent a lot of time on this: How does God appeal to me?
I have always said, music and mountains are how that appeal comes to me, but that's just a couple ways. I discovered a new one that I've always kind of known about, carpentry. See, I've been building a fence this weekend, by myself for the most part, which is good, because I am the only one who hears it when I say something in anger I shouldn't. Which is often, more often that I am comfortable with.
Anyway, as I put together this fence, I began to feel a kinship with Jesus, a carpenter's son. He built things with his hands, cut them to fit, pieced them together, solved the problems that arose. In fact, after popping the I-pod in my ears, I really discovered I found more peace, and less angry explosions over the ever stripping drill bit. I began to enjoy myself and feel God's presence. I prayed a bit more.
All this to say, maybe God doesn't just appeal to us in one way, but in many, if we're only willing to see it.

Open to Suggestions

We've been meeting weekly with the Gate for almost a month now, and we really are looking for alternative ways of worship. We set out to be 'not your typical church' in style, and yet thats what we look a whole lot like. So, we are thinking of alternative ways to do the corporate worship, besides announcements, sing, pray, and speak.
There is always taking the Eucharist, or Lord's Supper for you Evangelicals, but we want to steer that more toward the more intimate small groups. Dramatic readings can often be...not engaging at best and not worshipful at worst, prayer times are great, but for non-believers or those uncomfortable praying, it can be difficult. Vivid video with background music, asking people to read along silently and contemplate might be an option, but we need good video and music.
So what about you? What are some interesting ways you have experienced corporate worship?